Astrei Nathaniel (Part 1)
Why did it turns out this way? This was not part of my plan. My plan was very far from this. Gusto kong pakasalan siya. Gusto kong kasama siya sa kung ano mang mangyayari sa buhay ko. Gusto ko parte siya nun. Alam ko siya na..
I know deep in my heart that she also want to do everything with me.
"Stella. I'm sorry, alright? I was just.." I tried to say sorry dahil nasigawan ko siya kanina dahil sa sobrang gulong gulo ako. Isama pa yung video niya na may kasayawang lalaki sa dancefloor kagabi na pilit niyang dinedeny..
I know alright? It's normal to dance at parties, of course! But would you dance naughtily with other guy while you have a boyfriend who doesn't even know where you are???
Hindi lang ito ang unang beses na hindi ko alam na mag na-night out siya kasama ang mga kaibigan niya. She always do this. Parang walang nagaalala kung nasaan siya. Tapos sa huli ako pa ang mag sosorry. Bakit? dahil nagtanong ako?
Hindi ko maintindihan. Gusto ko lang magtanong. I don't want a fight with her. But everytime I ask her about something she will always get mad. What now? I can't even ask her a thing? Nagagalit din naman siya kahit kila ate lang ako pupunta.
"No. You shouted at me. You're so toxic, Astrei!" She gathered all her things and started walking towards the door. "Let's just breakup, you're such an asshole!" She slammed the door.
"Fuck!" Sipa ko sa upuan na natumba dahil sa lakas.
It's my fault. I know I shouldn't have shout at her but I just can't help it. I feel so frustrated and confused.
"Is this your first time here, sir?" The bartender asked while making me a drink.
"Yeah. It's not that bad here. I was always at Xylo."
"Yes sir. May banda dito tuwing 1am hanggang 3am ." I nodded at the bartender. I suddenly get interested so I decided to wait until 1am. Besides 11pm naman na.
Bumalik ako sa upuan namin ng mga kaibigan ko. They're trying to put me on the dancefloor but I refused, kaya lahat sila nandun na at ako nalang ang natira dito.
At exactly 1am I heard a beautiful voice while drinking. Damn! I didn't even realized that I already finished two bottles of hard liquor. Goodluck sa atay ko.
I got even more interested when the band wasn't playing anything hardcore. Infact they're playing a sad song that will actually make you sleep or cry.
I smiled at that. I was in the right bar after all..
"If by chance.. It doesn't work out with her. You'll always have a chance, wiht me and my world."
I don't know but I felt a stung in my chest.. It's beating very painfully. I can't even relate to the song so why am I feeling like this? I drink a shot to ease my feelings.
Napapikit nalang ako nang makitang nag drunk text ako kay Stella kagabi. Tangina naman..
Pero hindi nakatakas sa mata ko ang nagtext na unknown number. By just reading the message I know that I'm dead drunk last night for someone to take me home because I couldn't even walk.
"I will never gonna get drunk again like that." I swear to myself.
Eventually me and stella got back together. She forgave me and I don't know what to feel. I just know that my feelings for her right now is not the one I felt likethe first time.
