BAD CROW MOUNTAIN (Lesbian)

CHAPTER 1 Svartalf (part 1)

"Old Crook's cow croaked today."

"So what?" says a loud screaming voice.

"The cow pegged out just right on Goddess's patch, where the three roads meet. This is not good! Not good, I say..."

"Pish, pish for thee, you old fool! You'd better go to the kitchen and peel the onions for dinner. The farmer's wife, blast her, asked for onion soup with sheep's cheese."

"One day she wants me to serve her onion soup as if she's the queen who lives in the capital, then she wants an apple pie with cream - as if she has already forgotten about a terrible crop failure and drought last year. So many newborns died, oh goddess, good goddess, take them all to your gardens and fields. Did the wifey add at least one copper to my monthly salary? No! Do you know that I have been toiling at farmer's house for ten years?"

"Stop being annoying. Not your crops, cattle or newborns died. Be grateful that she lets you stay and work at her husband's house. No one else will hire you, just mark my words. Only this year she got two young earthy farmerettes from the nearby villages. They are strong, hardy, and complain little. Guess whom she'll keep when the choice comes?"

Whisper fighting, grumpy female voices begin to move away from the small stable where I spent the night.

I slowly sit up, shaking the straw out of my long hair. I have no money for a bed in an inn. I had to hastily fled from a different village where I had a small job. Unfortunately, I didn't have a chance to get my money, well, that kinda hurts actually, since I've been persuading the mermaids not to tear the fishing nets for at least one week until I got far enough out of the village. But who could have known that the blond girl has a jealous fiancé! It's good that I was able to get dressed before jumping out of her bedroom window.

"Get up and sing, Crow!" I smile at the cow that nuzzles my cheek. I wish her good morning.

I got the nickname Crow in my first year at the academy. I have coal black hair, black eyebrows, and black eyelashes. Some people think that I have dark eyes, but this is not true. They are actually dark blue, but the thick black lashes make them look black.

There is so little space in the guest yard and the tavern adjacent to it, that not only the guests' horses are kept in the stables, but also the tavern owner's cow and a huge dwarf's sheep (she's angrily chewing something) have to share their room with other quadrupeds.

I look sadly at the good horses. My horse and the luggage were stolen a couple of weeks ago.

"Maybe I should steal you too? What's the big deal? Some Westlandians ride cows just like horses." I pat the cow's ginger head. "I'm sorry that your friend died on the Goddess's patch. I'm sure she was a good cow too."

I put on my old basilisk skin jacket. It was given to me at the academy when I successfully finished it. All the teachers cried... with happiness that the most restless student finally left her dear alma mater.

It's time to leave my 'bedroom' in search of food. I know exactly where the food is. The stable is not far from the tavern that smells pleasantly of bacon, milk porridge with prunes and dried apricots.

It is already about nine o'clock, but by the standards of the villagers it is quite late. As for me, it feels like the crack of the dawn. I'm sure other travelers who has ever spent the night in stables would feel the same.

Leaving the stables, I pretend that I've just left my horse there. A boy in a torn, shapeless hat, that is too big for him, is waiting for me. He's sure I'll give him a couple of coppers so he could take care of my horse, but I proudly walk past him. I will not refuse a couple of coins in my pocket too. Maybe I can return to the capital and accept my teacher's help? No, to each his own. I am a practicing battle sorceress, not a sweet herbal-healer or a mysterious fortune-teller for capital nobility and their entertainment.