<>the header photo is not relevant to the story at all but I thought it was cool so yeah haha<>
-EMMAS POV-
Harry puts his arms in his front pockets and awkwardly walked over to me.I decide to stay in my place on the bed.
"So...what are you thinking" he says looking at me and swinging back and forth on his toes
"I don't know" I say.
My mind was full of words and I didn't know which ones to say.i knew what I was feeling but I also didn't know if I should tell him that.
"Okay Harry...I wasn't expecting that to happen at all but now that it has I don't know if it's a good idea." I half lie while playing with my fingernails
His face looks sad and disappointed but it also looks like he understands where I'm going with this.
He stays quiet so I decide to continue,"I mean we need each other and dating might make it too complicated..like,what if we didn't like it later.We would probably want to leave each other completely and we know that's not a good idea for either of us.Especially me"
"Yeah I was thinking the same thing,"Harry says.
I can almost tell he wasn't being completely honest with me but I'm not sure.His face wasn't very readable as he down looked at the floor.
"Are you okay with this?"I ask him kind of regretting my own decision.
"Yeah of course,I wouldn't want to make you uncomfortable and I think this is the best idea" he says giving me a small smile.
What have I done
"Okay"I say so quietly it's almost inaudible.
"Okay" he repeats as he takes his hands out of his pockets and slaps his pants.
"I'm sorry for starting this by the way"
"Well it's fine,I mean it takes two people to make out" I say with a little laugh.
What the hell? Why did I say that.An awkward silence falls between us until Harry decides to speak.
"I'll be in my room" he says stepping out of the door and closing it behind him.
I'm left alone in the silent room.I hear his footsteps go down the hall to his room and the door shuts.
"Why did I do that?" I say to myself.I put both hands on top of my hair and fall back on the bed.
I roll over and retrieve the diary under my bed and open to the sentence I wrote just a few minutes ago.
Under "I like him" I write "I ruined it"
Why did I have to ruin it.Obviously he likes me back and we could find a way to work it out.but it might be too late now...I scribble all over the page until I could no longer see what I wrote,then I rip the page out.
I crumple it into a ball with all my strength and throw it across the room angrily.
I push the diary off my bed along with it and pull my knees up to my chest.
I want to cry so bad because I know this is my fault.I just ruined my own happy ending.probably the only happy ending I would ever get.
"Don't cry,please don't cry." I whisper to myself.
Before I know it tears are rolling down my cheeks and I'm quietly sobbing alone in my room.
HARRYS POV:
I close my door and walk over to my bed. Once I reach the edge of it I collapse on the comforter and lay on my stomach for a few minutes.
I can't believe she said no.I don't know what I was expecting from her but I thought the kiss was worth something and she might change her mind.But she didn't and she won't.She made it very clear.I didn't know what to do with myself so I grabbed my the little leather book she gave my this morning.I quickly found a pen and opened it to the first blank page.
I without a second of thought I began scribbling words across the page.
"I would fight for you but I know you don't want me to.I would kiss you but I know you wouldn't like it.I want you to be mine but if you don't want that I'll let you go.No matter how much it hurts me."
I didn't realize it until now that I was crying and it was dripping all over the paper.
I close the book quickly and use my sleeve to wipe the tears away.
I'm going to have to move on but how? She's literally the only person I have and if I can't be with her than what am I supposed to do?
I couldn't help but wonder what she was thinking.
Was she having second thoughts?
I decided I had to tell her the truth and not just agree with everything she said.I wiped off my face and began to walk out the door.When I opened it Emma was already standing there with her hand up like she was about to knock on the door.Her face full of surprise.
Her eyes were red like mine probably were and she looked sad.
"Are you sure?" I ask vaguely.
"No" she says shaking her head.
Before I could say anything else she grabs my head and pulls in down to her.Our lips lightly brush against each other and it was perfect.
She pulls away and looks deep into my eyes.
"We can make this work right?" She ask tilting her head to the side and smiling.
"Totally"I answer and bring her face back to mine.
"One step at a time." She says quietly smiles at me during our kiss.
I don't know what happened but I'm glad she changed her mind.I'll do whatever it takes to keep her.This has to work.
<>I FEEL LIKE THIS CHAPTER IS KIND OF RUSHED BUT I LIKE IT.HOPE YOU LIKE IT TOO!THANKS FOR 400 READS TOO!DONT FORGET TO VOTE!❤️❤️<>
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-No control-
FanfictionI don't know how much longer we can keep this up.I don't know how well get through it.I don't even have a solid plan.All I know is I need you with me...in this world with no control. ...