Everything about this day feels familiar . It is like we are back at the very beginning , when I was 18 , learning to live on my own , and an obviously hormonal teenager . Like I said , familiar.
I am not entirely sure how it came back to this , me being in bed , drinking wine and absolutely obsessing over a guy who could not care about anything but my vagina . I would like to tell you experience has taught me to b e strong , or maybe just maybe age has taught me better , but of course that's not it. I am actually stuck between telling you the story of how I will not , by any means necessary stop falling for all the disgusting , vile men that resemble my very first love , yes , that one , the one who was supposed to be my hero , the one meant to love and cherish me , the one meant to be my mirror of love , my father.
Absolutely sucks if you ask me , falling in love with every trait you hate to your core , crying and beating yourself up trying to understand how one man , the man who is supposed to love you could possibly be so undeniably crude , and harmful to your very being - and still , manage to fall in love with a version of that . Yes , I am clearly broken , and destroyed , I am every bit of bent .I once convinced myself that I was the very definition of ductile , I could be bent , but never fully broken , I could withstand the highest pressures , I believed I was incohesive , but here I am 1825 days later feeling like I have done nothing but let down the strongest version of myself .
I got a little distracted earlier , you might still be wondering what my second option is , Its stopping all this right now , and fully believing who and what I am . I guess that would have been great 1500 days ago , but like I said , here I am , about to embark on my greatest heartbreaks , highest moments , lowest moments and everything in between .
Welcome to my pain and my happiness , welcome to my most embarrassing moments , welcome to the most erotic moments of my life , welcome to my brain , welcome to my bad days , and my good , and most importantly welcome to dear life.
YOU ARE READING
Dear Life
Non-FictionShe never stood a chance , It was always going to be her versus her trauma . It was her driving force , her safe haven , it was where her journey began.
