i can't help it,
i don't know why i feel the way,
i feelwhen it comes to
youit's been almost 2 years since we talked,
i got over it,
yuhbut,
ever since the beginning of april
last yeari started thinking about you again
and
i don't knowwhy
i get jealous,
when i see you with other girlsi don't know why,
you aren't evenmine
i guess i just miss the
attentionyou gave me
when you actually liked me
the way iliked you
or
at least i felt like thatwords mean nothing without action
and all you said waswords
sometimes,
i can't help myself but ask others about youor just look at your pictures
honestly,
i wish that things could of worked out,
even if we were event togethergood friends at least,
i know you don't live here,
and it still boggles my mind of how much
i still carebut,
that being saidi'll never forget what you did to me,
still hurts that you did that,
but what can i do?i just stay thinking about you,
even before you left,
i got jealous when i heard things about you,when you'd fuck other girls,
you fucked this girl in your car once,
cheating on your girlfriendafter july of that year,
you ghosted me and finally came to realization,that you needed to tell me why,
you said,
"i don't want to hurt you and keep you waiting, i hope you find someone and i think you will"but the thing is,
you did
you said we can stay friends,
never said anything after thatthen,
not even 2 weeks lateryou come back,
and that's where the mess startedyou,
you seemed a little different,
different thanbefore
you weren't as flirty,
a littlei don't wanna say it
but
fake?
but i kept trying,
cause i really liked youout of all of them actually
you decided one day,
you were slowly gonna stop talking to me,and that's what you did
at the end of october,
you blocked mei felt as if i was used for attention all fucking summer
than,
before the year ended,
you wanted to do something to bug meand it worked,
cause yuh thought it was funny butit wasn't
you're weird like that,
and i don't know why you're acting like that when i literally saw your dick on my screen lolafter all that,
you asked someone"do you still talk to her?"
"yeah why?""oh,
i'm just asking"
why would you ask if you didn't care?
just a thoughtlike,
why you wanna know?i don't know what it is,
is it your face?
the sound of your voice?
our past?the attention you gave me?
i guess we'll see what happens?
will i see you again?
that something to figure out
but,
until thennext time you know better
YOU ARE READING
what's out there ( a poetry story )
Poetrydeception is never ending, but so is the reality of my life read pay attention focus to every word i say welcome to your chapter