Rain Please Go Away

Just my diary literally

My name is Paisley I am a 16 year old girl and this is my life story. I was a baby,a baby that was just being born. I was born in the afternoon on December 31 1999. I still have flashbacks of those days.

I was just being born my dad was in the room my mom and my great aunt before all this happened my mom had to make a a very hard decision. My mom had decided that she knew she couldn't take care of me, so I would go to live with my great aunt. As soon as my mom went into labor she then decides once again that she could give her baby up. My aunt was devastated.

My mom and father had just got their very own apartment. My room was white walls and a pink crib. We couldn't paint because it was Red grove Apartments, and they were temporary apartments. My dad was an alcoholic and my mom was a druggy. My sister was about three years old when we moved there her name was Brianna.

I was a very happy baby. Surprisingly. My mom was not so much of a good mother. I was left in my little crib. Spoiled bottles everywhere. I would be so hungry i would drink those bottles. My Great Grandmother came over one day and thought about calling child services. My grandmother loved my mom too much to do that to her.

Once i got about 2 my mom had been high and sleeping. My sister got out the apartment. She was only five years old. Well with my moms luck here comes the police. Next thing i know the social worker putting my mom in jail and giving me to my other great aunt. I lived with my great aunt for 3 years. Next thing i know im at my grandmas. Another person who didn't want me.

My mom came back. To live with me at my grandmas. we were together everynight. If she got up in the night to use the restroom i would Scream and hold on tight. I slept right on her chest so if she got up to leave i would know. She lived with us for about 2 years. One night she told me she was leaving i was six or seven. My cousin just happened to be in town and convinced me to come with her on my moms last night. I regret that day still to now.  

                                                                                        years after that....

They say people have a reason to be mad at the world. I have many reasons to be mad at the world. Why spend your time on being angry at the world all the time. It sucks trust me i would know. When i started 2nd or 3rd grade that anger kicked in. I was mad all the time wondering why? why me? I shut everyone out because my own mother and father had done that to me. One night i ran through the glass door i didn't care anymore. I wanted to be happy in heaven with someone to love me.