Something About Nova

chapter 1

Monday 26th December 2015

"but i dont want to go back to councelling dad!"

I screamed out at my dad like there was nobody else in the room, but the truth is there was...there were many other people in the room because as per ususal we were in a bar, my dad never leaves these places anymore. Ever since that day...the day my mum passed away, he hasnt been the same. He always liked his alcohol but never did he use it as a pain reliever, never did he use it as a way to rid himself of his responsibilities, especially not the responsibility of looking after me. But i guess im not what's on his mind anymore...i'm not the reason he does this, i know that, but seeing him drink himself away into an early grave when i've only just lost my mum pains me...and nothing ever pains me, not these days. I've seen it all, from fights to break ups, from crying to laughing, from coming to going. My life has been a never ending cycle of mixed emotions, thrown into one huge cocktail of what is my life.

"you're going and that is it! conversation over! now go get me another drink!" his cold breath passed under my nostrills and i could smell the whiskey on him, i could smell the effect the alcohol was having on him...i could see it too.

    As soon as we got home from the bar that night, my dad left the house and walked down the cold road. I never saw him again. The council came and kicked me out of the house because i am a 16 year old, now orphaned boy who can't pay the extortionate bills that come to our home monthly. So now i'm being evicted and sent to a foster home, but theres no way on this god forsaken earth that i am going to live with two strangers and their winging children who i would be forced to sit across the table from at dinner while they all make the usual family small talk with the occasional comment of pass the peas, there is no way i am doing that...absolutely no way!

With my heart beating at a thousand miles per hour, i ran down the never ending road filled with warm looking houses that are much like my old one. Memories flood my mind of times that my mum and i would walk down this road hand in hand as she told me about all the things she wished she had done before her time was up. I really  missed my mum, she was my rock, my best friend and the only woman i've ever loved and probably ever will love at this rate. Her long auburn hair that flowed to her mid back, her jet blue eyes that could pierce deep within even the thickest of souls and her gracious smile that could brighten even the darkest days of my life and believe me i had plenty of those.

    As the heavy rain poured down, bringing with it a gust of the cold, icy December wind i walked slowly down the all too familiar street i now called home... As cold as it was i couldnt help but thank the heavens that the snow hadn't come yet. The cardboard surrounding me that was once sturdy was now a mushy pile smudged into the concrete - except the small patch i lay on curled up in the fetal position. The newspaper on my lap did absolutely nothing to prevent the harsh and bitter rain from spreading from my already completely soddened and ruined jumper to my patially soaked Kargo pants. I sighed looking down at my feet, the holes in my shoes were getting worse and i cold feel each one collecting it's own puddle on the inside...great!

    I've been out here for 3 weeks now, and to prove my point of how completely oblivious people had become of my existance since the day i got kicked out of my home, out of my family, i check my phone that is only just managing to survive this terrible journey with me, to then see that i yet again have no text messages...not even one.

    Day after day i continuously trecked up and down endless roads and endless roots to search for somewhere, anywhere but the foster home, i can't bare it there i'd rather stay on the streets than go there and have to suffer the rejection of yet another family, or risk getting attached like i did last time, only then to have that stability ripped away from me. I'll admit it, i'm not the kind of guy you'd want to take home to your parents, i'm bad, i'm dangerous and i'm a bomb ready to explode, waiting for an inncoent by stander to set me off and watch me blow everything in my wake to smitherines. Hopefully i'll find somewhere soon, maybe a walk will do me good...

He slowly entered the woods and began his small journey to nowhere when suddenly....