Lonely without you (completed) -Scömìche AU

Chapter 22

Scott's POV

I stepped backwards quickly when I heard Kirstie's voice, feeling a blush creeping on my cheeks and a deep disappointment taking over my feelings. Still there was at the same time some relief flooding through me too. I had always thought about what my first kiss would feel like and in my imagination it had been a bit more romantic than in a small cupboard at a party. I would not have minded to kiss Mitch at all right there in that moment, but now I got a chance to make it more romantic when it actually happened.

I looked back at Mitch but didn't get eye contact, he was looking at down at his feet and soon started to walk away from the small space after Kirstie. I followed him out and into the kitchen where both of them were heading.

There was a quite awkward silence when we arrived, Kirstie looking guilty but also kind of excited and Mitch still dodging my glances. Mitch cleared his throat and spoke up.

"Do you want some water?" It was super casual, but his voice was a bit quieter than usual.

"Sure." I had no idea how to act right now, was I supposed to bring it up or just let it be?

Kirstie looked at us, shaking her head and sighing. She moved to help Mitch with the water and even though I knew it was only meant for Mitch, I didn't miss her elbowing him and shooting him a what-the-hell-is-going-on –look. Mitch shrugged and gave me the water in silence.

"Thanks." I whispered, still confused about how he was acting and how I should act.

"No problem." He finally looked up but the only thing I could find in his eyes was friendliness. I felt my heart sink. Maybe nothing had changed, maybe he didn't mean anything he did. Heck, he didn't even do that much, it was just me leaning in to kiss him. Maybe I should just wait and see what he'll do.

***

That proved to be harder than expected but not impossible. Way too often I was reminded of the friendly looks he had started giving me.

Mitch was looking incredibly good though and kept close to me the rest of the evening. There was no more dancing and I was thankful for that. I didn't think I could deal with another guy trying to dance with Mitch without losing all self-control and doing something I'd regret later. 

We didn't stay for too long after what had happened, Mitch claiming to be tired. He did look a bit lost to be honest but I wasn't sure if it was loss of energy or just the need to think by himself. Either way, I definitely needed some time to think so we left the party at 10 PM leaving Kirstie there to dance with Jeremy. She seemed happy although every now and then she shot me a glance that was kind of guilty. When we went to tell her we were leaving she asked Mitch to get her one more drink and drew me aside.

"Scott stop this nonsense, don't let him ignore the fact that you two almost kissed. Trust me when I tell you that your opportunity is now, tonight. The least you can do is invite him for dinner and talk to him more there, just don't let it go okay?" I wasn't sure what to answer but I had a feeling she knew more than I did about Mitch so I decided to trust her advice.

"Okay, I won't let it go, not tonight."

"Perfect! Also I'm honestly really sorry about interrupting... I had no idea." I didn't blame her at all, she couldn't have known.

"It's okay Kirstie, I don't blame you one single bit." Kirstie sighed, relieved, and hugged me quickly. She let go when Mitch arrived with a glass in his hand and moved to hug her before handing it over.

"Take care of yourself hun, okay?"

"I will, you too and I'll see you soon."

"I'll see you. Bye Kirst!"

We left the building and I had to say, the fresh air felt really nice after having spent so long surrounded by a mass of people. We walked in silence to the car until I realized that both of us had had something to drink tonight.

"Mitch?"

"Yeah?"

"Who's going to drive?" He looked at me as if only now remembering that you weren't supposed to drive with any alcohol in your system, however little it was.

"I hadn't thought about that... Well would you fancy an evening walk? Your place is not that far away and I can ask my parents so pick me up there."

"Sure, let's walk."

***

The walk started off awkwardly until we got into a casual conversation about shoes. It was nice, but felt a bit weird knowing how different things could be right now if Kirstie had arrived a minute later into that small room. What was so special about seven anyways, why couldn't it have been eight minutes in heaven? I shouldn't dwell on this, no, I should come up with a way of sneakily asking Mitch out without actually asking him out. Easy, right?

We were getting nearer and nearer, now moving on to talk about one of Mitch's favorite shops and mostly leaving the fascinating topic of shoes. I had no idea how to bring up the dinner so we just chatted until arriving to my house.

"I guess we should say goodnight now, Mother and Father are going to be here in no time."

"Oh, yeah we probably should."

There was as silence that lasted way longer than it should have and made us both look down at our feet instead of each other. It was a shame, I would prefer looking at Mitch to almost anything and now when I had the chance I somehow didn't have the balls to do it.

Was I supposed to hug him? Would it be okay if I did? I had no idea. So I asked.

"Are we okay?"

"Of course why wouldn't we be?" He sounded too cheery and the answer came too quickly but it made it harder for me to question it. I reminded myself of the promise I'd made to Kirstie and took a deep breath.

"Mitch we can't just act like it didn't happen..."

"True, but does it change anything? After all, nothing really happened." I was hurt by his words. Didn't it really mean anything to him? Why was he being so cold?

He must've seen the look in my eyes because he hurried to continue:

"I mean, we shouldn't dwell on something that didn't even happen, right?"

"Right." I hated being this sad and hurt about such a small thing, it felt awful. And it wasn't even a big deal. It wasn't like anything had really happened. Still I felt almost on the edge of tears.

"Okay well then I'll see you soon, maybe tomorrow? We should practice with the guys if Kirstie isn't too hangover." Mitch's voice was missing some of his usual spunk and I had no idea why but I had other things on my mind. That was why I didn't have the interest to search his eyes for any signs of what it might mean.

"Okay, tomorrow it is. Goodnight Mitch."  Mitch could most certainly hear the sadness in my voice but I was suddenly too tired to care. I turned around and walked up to the door without hugging him goodbye.

I knew that if I'd do that, I'd start crying and that would not make anything better.

These tears were to be cried out alone.

A/N

filler chapter yesyes like the shortest one in forever i know but get excited for the next chapter because you know... stuff will happen

i'm sorry it's a bit sad but kinda necessary (i think) for the future events to work.

i promise the next one will be longer okay I PROMISE

i loooved reading the comments on the previous chapter and now i feel kinda bad that this is so short but hey the weekend is coming and i'll update soon again.

xx N