Ordinarily, Extraordinary

Prologue

I heard my principal say the words I'd been dreading for the past two weeks.

It was like I was watching myself, you know? Not really present in the moment, but just watching every little moment align after the one before it. Eventually molding all together into one final memory, like a movie.

I sat there on the stage, just waiting, praying that this would go the way I planned. I'd been on stage more times than I could remember. Performed in front of thousands and thousands of people that I didn't even know, personally. So why was this so hard. I'd grown up with these people my whole life. I knew them. They knew me. Oh, wait... they don't know me.

That's why this is so hard. Fuck it, this shit is TERRIFYING. I'm finally telling them. I knew eventually this was gonna happen, but it's like time just slipped outta my hands. As much as i tried to hold onto it, the sand just slipped away from me. It's really happening. I don't know why I'm making such a big deal out of this. It's not like anything is gonna change. Everyone who knows the secret has told me that they support the decision. I know plenty of people want to know more about Nola, but it just all feels so surreal knowing that when I walk off this stage, everyone I've grown up with will finally know.

It took a lot of work putting this together but I genuinely feel like I need to do this. Not just for my fans, not just for my friends and not just for my family, but for me. I'm tired of hiding. I'm tired of having to lie and pretend like I'm some mysterious, unknown person. I want to be able to perform and connect with my fans and be treated like an ordinary teenager. I'm only 18 and I feel like absolutely NOTHING in my life is ordinary. But this is what I need to do. This is where I let everyone know why I'm always "sick", or having "family issues". At this point I'm running out of "deceased family members" who's "funeral" I "have to attend". It's just too much.

My hands are fidgeting in my lap while I hear my principal introduce me.

"And now, your class Valedictorian, Avalon Ramirez."

I heard the applause, and normally, that sound sent the alarms off in my brain and all I can think is "SHOWTIME". But only one word was constantly replaying over and over in my head right now...

"FUCK!"

"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. FUCK!"

Okay Ava. You can do this. Just go up there and say it. Honestly, how bad could it be? Just go up there, say all that shit about navigating your way into this next chapter of life, being in the real world, college, bills, blah blah blah, and that you're an international superstar who's been living a double life to make the journey of finishing high school easier.....no biggie...right?

FUCK

Here goes...

I get to the podium and start my speech.

I talk about all the shit that everyone says about leaving high school and all that good jazz. I feel like my heart is about to drop out of my literal ass, right about now. I look into the sea of parents and family members and I spot the neon pink hair belonging to my little sister, that looks like a little pink dot from here. Then I look into the rows of grads and see my best friend Natalya towards the back giving me a thumbs up.

you got this, Ava.

I clear my throat, take a deep breath and smile.

"Today marks an important day in all of our lives. It is now that we learn the true definition of the word 'change'. A lot of people, including myself find change to be an anxiety-ridden thing. Which is why I'm telling you to embrace your change. As many of you know I've "missed" quite a lot of school. I was either "sick" or dealing with a "family emergency".  But none of that is true."