my name is mr skelly bones. im a 11 year old boy trying to become the world's greatest hunter. why, you mgiht ask? its because i was always,,,, different from everyone i ever met, especially at school. i was aksways picked on by the 'popular' kids. but today, i'm going to show them that all the things they said to me were wrong!!! because im not a nippleface! im NOT a poopyhead!!!! and lastly: i am not, and never will be: GAY!!!
after spitting on the ground of the porch near my parents house, after a lengthy and GIRTHY talk of me basically jut swearing and saying slurs to my parents, i left the house, with nothing but a bright pink dildo: a memoir from my dad.
passing the trial with the big fox shapeshifters with absolute eaase because i was a trained spy from my parents, who always pushed me as humanly possible: which was not a lot, because i was immortal and the alpha and a GOD.
so i made it past the 'first phase', first try, obviously because im the best; and i was strolling around the waiting area, taking note of the other contenders that might, maybe, stand a chance against me. as i serenely and hotly walked around the place, a big man, who towered over my frail body came up to me, his footsteps thundering in a slow, semenly friendly cadence. "hello, im tonpa, and ive never seen your unhumanly attractive face here in these slums before!!!" the big man said. since i was so small and pequeno, his voice alone almost blew me away.
"I'm Mr. Skelly Bones, a-and I'm not here for idle chatting." i said, not taking any of his bulstip.all of a sudden, we hear loud (s)creamign and a man's arms has been blown away like petals in the wind because they WERE petals and his arms turned into petals.
"anyways, since you're new here, here's a 'good job for making it here' gift!!" tonpa abruptly said after the man's arms turned to petals. the big man handed me an orange soda, like the one kim kardashian liked in that one tiktok audio. i refused, beceause if i knew one thign, it was to never trust strangers!! unless they are hot.
"no thanks, im not thirsty, and i know that has drugs!" i yelled, catching the attention of number 44, who looked at me and tonpa and licked his lips.Then, a tall man with a big mustache entered the room. he concraptulated us for making it past this far.
2: running in the 2010's
as we ran, i began to contemplate life. why was i doing this? to spite my parents? when i make it, what do i do after? i don't have anything to do. i can;t just go back to my parents, just because i was now a hunter? i could chase an aspiration of mine. but... i have no aspiration. i have no intrests. i've just been floating through life, rolling with the punches that life throws at me.
my
existence
changes
nothing.
while feeling my life flash through my eyes, i catch a glimpse of a green... hedge? no, it was boy, looking to be around my age. soon, we catch eachother's eyes, and he comes closer to me.
"hi, im goN!" the greenette says. i stare at his bright and monolithic orbs. they were hazel, like a caramel.
my mini, microscopic frame frame musters the strength to say anyhting because im shy and stuff, and at last i say, "hello my name is mr skell bones" a light pink blush dusting over my cheeks. oh no, im gay. the 5th graders were right. as gon says a brisk goodbye after picking up the pace, my head lowers in shame, knowing that the 5th graders of skeleton elementary were right. that i do in face love men. and i was in lvoe with gon freecs. teras pricle in my face, rolling down my small conpact face, like a rainstorm on my face, because i was crying.
a few minuts pass
as i was running, i hear a skkamtebord and i look behind me. it was a boy with white hair, and a blue and white shirt. wow, he was attractive too. again, my cheeks flushed with a beautiful and hot and really attractive pink. Oh no. A pang of shame hit, knowing, yet again, that my peers were correct.
A/N: omg guys this was so fun to write and thank you for 0 rads!!! im so greatful that my writing could strike hte hearts of so many epople and im so exited to announce
nothing
YOU ARE READING
mr skelly bones' fantastical stoyr of oc x canon
Fanfictionthis is NOT ironic i promise
