love of my life

001

it was a late thursday night, 11:38 pm to be exact. i had just gotten my pajamas on, just an old tshirt and shorts, and was taking out some trash that had been sitting by the door for way too long. i hadn't gone many places outside the trailer in almost a month. i don't want any reminders, i don't want to talk to anyone, and i don't want anything to trigger my ever going anxiety. when eddie was still here, he was the only thing that would actually help ease my nerves and calm my anxiety panic attacks. with him gone i have only made it to school 3 times in which each time i just sat in my car having a panic attack, shaking and crying.

as i walk outside to put the trash in the bin i turn to head back inside when there's a sound of a stick cracking behind me. i quickly spun around and saw him. no no no this isn't real. it's a ghost, i tell myself. a dark figure, dark curls fraying out the side of his head. I can't quite make out the face but I recognize who it is.

"y/n" he says stepping closer to me.

"no...no it's not...i can't...you're..." and before I realize it,  i'm shutting the door behind me and going to sit on the couch. i face away from the door as i hear his footsteps come up the steps of the trailer. i look at the rain stained windows and watch as new rain starts to fall and splatter to the window.

"y/n..." he said again.

all of a sudden i was upset "this can't be happening. i watched you die, you died in my arms eddie. this is just my imagination" you turn around to see him sitting next to you, looking at you with a deep expression. you can see his eyes look bloodshot, not because of drugs or anything, but out of pain.

"y/n im here, im okay don't worry"

my head was spinning, how was this possible. he died in my arms, he bled to death, theres no way anyone can come back to life.

"how..." i started but i felt like i was being choked. "how are you...alive?"

he grabbed my hand and kissed it. his rings still on each of his fingers, my pointer finger of my right hand had one of his favorite rings still on it, of course I never took it off. his hands were cold and calloused.

he smiled his warm smile and as his lips opened i saw it. fangs. vampire fangs.

i scooted away..."Eddie, what are those." was he here to kill me? was he possessed?

"Y/n please,, im not going to hurt you, I never will, and I never intended to, its going to be okay, come here"

i scooted back so I was now laying on his chest. I burrowed my face into the crook of his neck. My body starting to relax a bit. my breathing starting to slow down. He wraps his arms around me and rests his head on mine.

"You stink" I say and I laugh into his hair. Thats the first time ive laughed in a month.

he laughs too, his voice is soft and deep. Just how I remember it.

"I guess I should get cleaned up" he says.

He holds my hand and walks to the bathroom. I turn on the water for him and the only sound in the room is him taking off his rings and setting them on the counter. I go to grab him a towel and fresh clothes. when I walk back to the bathroom he's taking off his shirt. that's when I see them. scars all over his chest and body. I set down the towels and go over to him and look at them. tracing my fingers along each of them. he shudders when I first touch them, winces almost. I just stand there staring at them as he lifts up my chin slowly.

I am holding in any tears and sobs I have in me, I don't want to know just how broken I have become yet. not yet. I can see there are tears building up in his eyes so I look away.

"y/n... look at me..please" I can hear his voice just slightly crack at the end. I look up at him, into his big brown eyes, one's I had never forgotten what it feels like when you look into them. He pulls me into a hug as the steam fills the room. I sit down on the counter as he gets into the shower. I don't want to leave the room in case something happens. We don't talk the whole time as he showers, I find a point on the wall, a small chip in the stucco. I remember when that happened. Almost a year ago, Eddie was rushing around trying to find his special guitar pick and somehow ran into the wall. don't ask me how because I still wonder the same thing.

I focus on the chip on the wall trying to block out anything else until he is all cleaned up. I head to the bed as he gets dressed in his boxers. 

I go and lay down in the bed, my back towards where he normally lays. I start to cry, tears pouring down my face, but quietly enough so he can't hear me. I hear him come into the room and crawl into the bed next to me, heat from the shower radiating off of his skin. He see's me silently shaking and soft little sobs coming out.

"darling" he says as he grabs my waist and gently pulls me into him. He pulls me around so now I am facing him. tears now staining my face and feeling like it will never stop. his hands are shaking ever so slightly. 

"shhh, shh it's okay I am here now love, nothing to worry about, im not going anywhere" he puts his hand on the side of my face and wipes my tears away. He pulls me so close to him I warm up almost instantly, he puts his hand in my hair and strokes my hair until I fall asleep.

"goodnight love" is the last thing I hear him say before I drift off to sleep.

**just a little disclaimer, I was thinking about writing this story while I was at a concert and could not stop thinking about it. I started writing it as soon as I got home. this is my first time writing a story in awhile so please leave comments of what you think and tips to help :) 

all the love, m