A thin line - Ver x Ric

Chapter 2

I stare at you when you're not looking.

I couldn't help but notice Max acted a little off today. And I knew it had nothing to do with the fact he had a bad night of sleep. I knew him too well for that. Something inside me might already know why he's so upset but I'd like to deny it until I can't anymore. A hidden talent most people don't know about is that I'm quite good at faking my smile, just as I did today. I didn't care about the fact I was feeling like shit. All I wanted was to make Max smile. So I put on my mask and acted like any other day. When I finally saw that beautiful smile on his face which made dimples on his cheek I couldn't help but fall in love with him all over again.

Once we were done with all our media duties of the day Max practically ran out of the building. I tried calling his name but he was already too far gone to hear me. I sighed and walked to my car. Once I sat inside I waited a few minutes before I drove off to my hotel. I parked my car in the garage but didn't get out. Something was itching me to go see Max. I eventually decided to shoot him a text asking him if he wanted to hang out. But I should have known better than thinking I would get him to reply. Why would he storm off and seconds later reply to my text? 

I decided to get out of the car and go for a walk. I needed to clear my head. My mind was working over hours the last few weeks. Needing to focus on the last races but also the big decisions involving my future career. It calmed me down a little knowing I would be driving with Renault next year. But still, things were hectic. My feelings were all over the place and I had more than once convinced myself to tell Max about them. Of course, I stopped myself on time, but still. I felt cold breeze travel through the air. I wrapped my jacket tighter around myself. I stopped at a bench near the pond looking at the birds trying to find something to eat. I have always been fazed by the beauty of nature. Things continued their way no matter what. Us humans would stop and rethink every decision or change in our plans. Sometimes I wondered how it would feel to be a bird. Free to go were ever I want to. Flying on the wind took me to places I'd never seen before. 

I was grounded by my phone going off. I grabbed it from my pocket, which was a whole task because of my frozen fingers. I sighed once I read Jos's name on the screen. I never liked the man, never since Max told me stories about his childhood. The man never called unless he had something that bothered him. Or more me that stood in the way of his son's career. "Hello?" I asked while answering his call.  "Daniel, how come I have to find out from the local paper you're leaving Redbull?" He asked, his voice sounding emotionless and stone cold as always. "No one outside of the team and a few other drivers new. We decided to keep it a secret as long as possible." I tried to explain. I heard Jos letting out a frustrated sigh on the other side. "Did you even consider how this would impact Max's career? His head will be all over the place. You know he needs to focus on his race, not on someone meaning less like you." Jos spoke harshly. I tried to ignore the burning feeling of tears pricking behind my eyes. "You know what Jos? I don't care if it will affect Max's career or not!" I screamed angrily before ending the call. 

I pushed my phone back into my pocket and let my feet carry me back to the hotel. I walked past my room and knocked forcefully on Max's door. Only a few seconds later the door slowly opened. Max's head peaked from behind the door. I didn't notice his tear-stained cheeks. I pushed him aside and entered the room. "Daniel, what's going on?" Max asked. I ignored his trembling voice. I harshly pushed him against the wall. My hands dug into his shoulders keeping him in place. His fear-filled eyes met mine. Still, I didn't stop any of my actions. I was completely blinded by anger burning inside me. "Daniel..." Max tried again. 

"Why Max, tell me why!" I yelled in his face. Max stayed silent. "Why is all they do care about you? Care about you're future, your career. All I am to them is a pain in the ass who's keeping you from what you're supposed to do. Become a world champion, and break these records. But no one cares to spend a glance at me." I yelled releasing all my anger through my words. I noticed a silent tear rolling down Max's cheek. My mind started to clear a little after letting everything out. I started to get my senses back. I finally took a moment to notice the trembling boy in my grasp. I noticed his tear-stained cheeks, I noticed his glossy eyes looking up at me. I wanted to so bad but I couldn't release my grip. My body wouldn't listen. 

Tears streamed down my face. Even though his whole body was shaking in fear Max raised his hand and slowly wiped away the tears falling down my face. "Daniel?" He asked again. I shook my head. I wanted to look away but I couldn't, I wanted to apologize but no words came out. "Daniel talk to me, you're scaring me." Max begged. "I can't..." I whispered in a broken voice. Max nodded and opened his arms pulling me into a tight embrace. I buried my face in his neck. Taking in his sent. I slowly felt my muscles relax. A wave of guilt flooded over me. 

I felt Max guiding me around the room. I was softly pushed on the big kingside bed. Once my head landed on the pillow I realized how tired I was. Tired of people judging me, tired of getting hurt. But mostly tired of hiding my feelings. I felt the bed dip beside me but I couldn't bring myself to open my eyes. I felt someone stroke their fingers through my hair. "I'm sorry..." I heard a familiar voice whisper before I fell asleep.