Kaisoo: Unattainable Love

16: Hurt

3rd POV

Hundreds of phones buzzed at that exact moment when the fatal text was sent. The phone of every student attending Seoul High School of the Arts. The text that made Kai look like a cheater, like a liar. The text that Kai also happened to recieve.

It all clicked in Kai's head at that moment. That video was what made Kyungsoo think Kai was cheating, that video from all those years ago.. All at once, Kai was infuriated, and apologetic. Infuriated that Joonmyeon would decieve Kyungsoo like that, and then say he cared about him, and apologetic for yelling at Kyungsoo earlier. Kyungsoo had seriously thought Kai was cheating on him. Kai couldn't even begin to fathom how much that had probably hurt his lover, especially after all the things he'd said just a few hours earlier.

And as soon as those thoughts entered his head, Kai knew what he had to do, he had to talk to Kyungsoo. He bolted out of his house and towards Kyungsoo's apartment building. He prayed that Kyungsoo hadn't gone home with Joonmyeon, because he had no clue where Joonmyeon lived. But as he rushed up the narrow staircase that led up to the floor where Kyungsoo's apartment sat, he was relieved to find the door unlocked, as it always was.

Kai walked in and headed straight towards Kyungsoo's bedroom, quietly opening the door to the room.

"You know if you leave you're door open all the time, someone bound to break in sometime," Kai said nonchalantly, and Kyungsoo jumped at the sound of a voice, let alone Kai's voice. His owl eyes widened as he looked to Kai, scooting back on his bed, towards the wall.

"W-what are you doing h-here.." Kyungsoo stuttered out, his eyes filled with sadness. "Get out, go away.." He continued.

"About that video.." Kai began, but he was quickly cut off.

"What about the damned video Kai? Here to rub it in my face?" Kyungsoo asked defensively with hurt eyes. "Because I get it Kai, I'm not as good as that fucking girl," He continued with glistening eyes. Those words made Kai miserable. The fact that Kyungsoo thought that he preferred some stupid girl over him made Kai hurt inside, because he knew that he'd hurt Kyungsoo.

"Kyungsoo, that's not true, that's not even remotely close to being true.." Kai said sofrlt and took a step towards the bed, but Kyungsoo crawled further away.

"Not true? You can't tell me that what I saw with my own two eyes isn't true.." Kyungsoo said as he curled his knees up to his chest.

"I did kiss her," Kai began, and Kyungsoo quickly shook his head.

"So you are just here to rub it in, just leave me alone," Kyungsoo said as he scooted farther away, burying his face in his knees.

"But," Kai continued. "I kissed her a long, long time before I'd ever met you.." He finished in a soft tone, and Kyungsoo looked up from his knees.

"What?"

"Kyungsoo that video was taken years ago.." Kai said softly.

"You mean.." Kyungsoo began, but Kai cut him off this time.

"Yes Kyungsoo, I mean that I didn't cheat on you. I'd never cheat on you, I'd never even think to," He finished calmly. Kyungsoo's eyes widened again, and they quickly filled up with heavy tears as he began to frantically shake his head.

"No.. no... no.." He said between sniffles as a few tears began running down his cheeks.

"Baby what's wrong? Don't cry.." Kai said as he took a step towards Kyungsoo's bedside, but Kyungsoo put his hand out, to stop Kai from coming closer, his other hand coming up to cover his own mouth.

"I cheated on you Kai, I cheated on you.." Kyungsoo mumbled frantically as tears slipped down his cheeks. "It was Joonmyeon.. I let him kiss me, I let him touch me... I l-let him take my virginity.." Kyungsoo confessed in one big jumbled mass of words.

Of course, Kai knew that, and though the images of Kyungsoo in bed with another man flashing into his head were torture, he had already forgiven Kyungsoo for that. He knee that Kyungsoo had been hurting at the time, thinking that he had been cheated on.

"Shh baby, it's okay.. I-" Kai began to comfort Kyungsoo as he moved to sit beside him, but Kyungsoo's small hands pushed Kai away.

"No Kai, it's not okay! It's not okay at all! I should've never let him do that, I should've trusted you and known you'd never cheat on me! I didn't even enjoy it but I let it happen.. I'm so stupid and I'm so sorry..." Kyungsoo said between sobs as he cried into his hands.

"Baby I forgive-" Kai tried to speak again, but Kyungsoo interrupted.

"Kai, I will not let you forgive me for this, I don't deserve your forgiveness. You deserve someone who trusts you and loves you better than I can.. Just go away, I deserve to be alone," Kyungsoo cried out as he buried his face in his hands.

"Kyungsoo, I love you, and I forgive you," Kai said in a steady tone, as his hand moved to lightly rub Kyungsoo's back but Kyungsoo shoved his arm away.

"Stop loving me Kai," Kyungsoo said as he peeked up with teary eyes. "Just go." Kyungsoo stood and pushed Kai all the way to the door of his apartment with his small arms. But before he could get Kai out the door, Kai grabbed his arm a moment, and leaned in to press a soft kiss to Kyungsoo's lips. He let his lips linger against the other's a moment before he pulled away.

"I'm never going to stop loving you Kyungsoo, no matter what happens. When will you realize that?" Kai said in a sincere tone, causing more tears to flood Kyungsoo's eyes before he pushed Kai out the door and shut it, locking it before he let his back rest against the door, sliding down against it as he cried into his own hands.

Kai let his back slide down against the other side of the door with a loud sigh as he listened to Kyungsoo cries. Kyungsoo was stubborn, and Kai had no idea what he was going to do about this.

"Baby don't cry, tonight.." Kai sang softly as he leaned his head back against the wooden door.

"Eodumi geochigo namyeon.." He knew Kyungsoo could hear him.

"So baby don't cry cry nae sarangi neol jikil teni.." He just prayed he would listen..

//authornim.