Love You More

chapter one - shiver

Alice held her folders and binders to her chest, her fragile fingers nearly turning blue from the cold, mid-October air.

She wore her nicest shoes: black leather Mary Janes with heart straps across her white socks that clicked quietly on the pavement as she walked home.

She kept her head down, letting her coffee colored hair cover her rouged cheeks, flushed from the breeze and the few drops of rain that fell.

Feeling the shivers running up her legs, she wished she'd chosen a more appropriate outfit that morning.

Her straight fitting skirt, though thick in material, only came to her upper thigh and left her legs only to be protected by the sheer black tights she wore.

She was thankful for her high-necked sweater and the coat layered over it for preserving enough heat to make the short walk home bearable.

Alice lived in a very nice neighborhood, in a cookie-cutter house with a white picket fence; the only differentiating marker being the curly numbers on the mailbox.

She had lived in that house since she was born, and she grew to be friends with the girls who lived in the neighboring homes: Grace and Charlotte.

Alice only cursed that she'd become so used to walking home with them.

She rounded a corner, a sigh left her chapped lips, leaving a white cloud in its wake.

She didn't want to feel upset with her friends for leaving her alone, because she knew that it was selfish to expect them to put her before their plans, but part of her wished that they had.

She knew that she would have never left them to walk on their own, but she also knew that her mind worked a bit differently than theirs.

She walked faster, hearing amber leaves crunch beneath her heels.

She loathed how silent the streets were. They seemed vacant, but Alice still felt as if all eyes were on her. She focused on the sidewalk to avoid them.

She wanted so desperately to look casual, like she was a normal teenage girl walking home from school, but she couldn't. 

Her mind was too set on how bare she felt out in the open by herself.

She flinched at the intense sound of a car driving over the puddles of rainwater that collected on the road along the sidewalk.

Most jarring, the car stopped at the cherry red stop sign at the end of the street where Alice would have to cross moments later.

Her button nose twitched; she realized she'd have to walk past the car to get to the connecting sidewalk.

Her numbed fingers curled over her binders. She straightened her stature, squared her shoulders, and tried to mimic the secure steps of an assured person.

She braced herself as she approached the area of the sidewalk parallel to the car, she held her breath.

She heard the low pitched wiring of the passenger side window of the car rolling down as she passed.

She closed her eyes as her feet reached the end of the sidewalk. She breathed in deeply.

She wanted to run away, but her older sister's words gently encouraged her in the back of her mind to be safe, encouraging her to do what she'd been taught to do as a child.

She let her breath be shakily let out and she leaned her torso forward to see down either side of the street to check for oncoming cars.

When she saw nothing she almost stepped down onto the pristinely painted crosswalk, but she was stopped.