Only The Past | Book 1

02

TAYLOR
present

I love being a woman, but I hate the male gase you get for being a woman. The fact when I go on a bus or train with a short skirt I see about two fifty year old men starring at my bare legs. I can imagine what's going on into there heads "I would love to fuck that girl right up the pussy" as there discussing dicks get hard. It's vial word we live in now that girls need to think about how they dress so it doesn't seem like they are "asking for it" and then it's aways that typical answers. "what was she wearing?"

DISCUSSING.

That's one of the good thinks I like about boarding school you don't need to be around those type of people if you chose. You just go to classes then go back to your dorm. Then there is me i even though I hate everyone following me and praising me I like it and hate it at the same time because I know if I need help I have someone just waiting to be with me, that's one of the good things about being 'miss popular'.

But the things I do hate about it is that some people can't get there head around the fact that I want to be by my fucking self, the question that aways comes my way no matter what. "What do you have to be sad about your so popular?" Like just because I have everyone around me I can't struggle with family issues and depression. That depression that got so bad at one point that I tried to take my own life three years ago.

But I can't blame anyone for it

My heart is so heavy but yet so empty inside

Because I don't deserve anyone

But it's my fault

I am aways "asking for it" that's what my foster
father says

well before I left for boarding school.

That's probably where I got my hateful thought of men from Liam. Liam being my foster father.

••••••••

"Did you see the new boy?" I hear Iris call from the other side of the door. "New?" I respond back to her.
"Yeah did you see him?" Iris repeats. "Of course I didn't fucking see him I am in the bathroom." I say back to her stupid question, I mean the bathroom has no windows and I have been in the bathroom for about an hour and a half. How would I have see him?

"Alright calm the fuck dowwwnnn." Iris fires back."His dorm is next door with Jude Myers." she adds.

Walking out the bathroom shutting the bathroom door behind me, seeing Iris sitting on her bed that sits opposite from mine but not planned out like all the other dorms on campus.

We have our beds opposite each other again the back walls like all the other dorms but this our one we have the bed frame on the very back wall so the bed end is facing the fount door that is dressed in our own Linen. With window in the middle of the beds, just how the dorm rooms where planned out but but me and Iris have put our makeup table in the middle where the rest of the doors normally have nothing there. The wardrobe next to the wall that parts the room from the bathroom. The mirror that is my favourite thing in this room that is stuck to the maroon fount door, all of the doors in this campus are maroon.

I don't know why but at Cruisenook Creek they don't let you change anything that could be stained, even though it's our dorm and we are paying for it.

"Ur ready, FINALLY." Iris teases whilst sitting on her bed and leaning her back on the wall next to her bed. "Mmmmm" I roll my eyes at how she always says how I take long to get ready.

"Pass me my pink lace bra, my red thong, also the blue low wasted jeans with the grey tank top please" I say looking at Iris with her hair that was cut into layers, the hair on her four head parting into curtains. Her eyes brown the darks I have see in someone's eyes but get her soul was so bright. Her lips so full that it was always covered in lipgloss and a sliver nose ring that is dangling off her right nostril.

She is the most beautiful black woman I have never see in my life.

Untucking my violet coloured towel that covers my bare body that had a slight curve to it. Sliding on my clothes that Iri has just thrown at me that makes my body much warmer then before but keeping my hair normally straightened in it's normal brown colour.

"You ready for English?" I call Iris from the fount door as I look at my outfit in the mirror. Sliding on my white nike air max plus shoes that are so outworn but I someone how have not grown out a size three since grade six. Grabbing my red and back stripped sweeter from the bathroom door quickly, whist in middle of walking out the fount door with Iris trailing behind me.

Walking on the field that separates the dorms from the classes with Iris walking by my side. "AY TAYLOR." I hear a deep voice shout from the crosswalk that is not so fare away from us, so I don't know why he is shouting. "yeah?" I answer back at the boy that I don't know. "WHY DON'T YOU SKIP CLASS AND COME RIDE ON THIS DICK?" he says whilst grabbing one of is friends heads and dose the action of him giving him head. "Why don't you suck my dick?" I fire back out of rage of anyways being catcalled. Lifting up my left hand and flipping him off.

Grabbing Iris hand and scurrying off away from them.

DICKHEADS.

They always are thinking with there dicks and not there heads. There dicks being probably smaller then my pinky because if men....... I mean boys are acting all cocky then you know there dick is defending minuscule AS FUCK.