Utsukushii Kare/ My Beautiful Man [ENGLISH TRANSLATION]

Chapter-1; PART-1: He is Beautiful

                                   Translator: White Lotus
                             

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The music that played while he was leaving the school was called "The Road Home", and He didn't like the melody which created a strange sense of uneasiness.

It felt as if it was deliberately trying to make you feel lonely in order to make you go home early.

After school ended in the evening, Hira was listening to this melancholy music while feeding the rabbits at school with the bread that he had for lunch. At that moment, an uncle in a jersey called out to him from behind.

"Do you like rabbits?"

Since he was at school, he must be a teacher. But not the teacher of the Hira's grade. An ominous feeling rose up in Hira's heart at being accosted by an older man he didn't know at all. Ah, I think it's going to happen. With that in mind, he opened his mouth to answer with simple words "I like them".

"I, I, I, li-"

Ah, as expected. The words didn't come out again. Hira's face turned red, sweating underneath his shirt that couldn't be seen.

The man tilted his head as if he was in trouble at the repeated word 'l' of Hira.

"So, you like rabbits. Remember to go back before it gets dark."

The teacher in the jersey patted Hira's head gently and then turned around and left. Hira lowered his head while squeezed the bread in his hand. Why? These were simple words "I like them".

"......I like them."

When he tried to say it again, the words came out smoothly, Hira felt a wave of despair.

He had no problem talking with his family or familiar friends, but when he got nervous, he couldn't speak. It was even worse when he was called upon to read aloud the text in the Japanese language class. In a quiet classroom where everyone was listening to him reading. Everyone giggled at him as Hira became flustered.

When he had just entered elementary school, his parents, who had received a report from his homeroom teacher, decided to take Hira to the hospital. He was diagnosed with dysphemia*, but the doctor told him not to be too nervous. He then advised Hira to take deep breaths when he felt nervous and to calm down before speaking. This advice was very effective. But it was not perfect. It wouldn't work if he panicked before he had a chance to calm down. It would become like this that had happened just now, "I, I, I, li.."

(T/N: The CIE-10 (International Classification of Mental and Behavioural Disorders -W.H.O) defines dysphemia as the “speech impediment characterised by a frequent repetition or prolongation of sounds, syllables or words; or by the rise of frequent doubts or pauses which interrupt speech's rhythmic flow”.)

Moreover, the most troublesome thing was that he got nervous most of the time, so he didn't know when and where the dysphemia would start occurring. The students were annoyed with Hira, who repeated "su-su-su-su" and "ka-ka-ka-ka" like a broken peashooter. Naturally, Hira became a taciturn child.

Hira developed a habit of taking several deep breaths to relieve his nervousness when he was asked questions by someone, and finally started to speak only when the other person began to feel impatient. Of course, his classmates were annoyed with him. They called him an idiot.

Of course, Hira felt bad and sad.

But still he thought that being an idiot was better than being disgusted.