I Loved Him From The Very Beginning

I loved him from the very beginning... its those eyes that looked as if he needed saving. The smile he decided to show.. but all I saw him say is "I'm not ok" its that face I saw first, the look I recognized. I loved him from the very beginning... the embrace he decided to give me without complaining or looking away from. Those times he let me in if only for a moment there he was open to me. I loved him from the very beginning... I didn't have to approach him, he willingly gave himself to me, which I was thankful for. He decided to show me his heart and in return its the one thing I would like to guard until we're both gone. I loved him from the very beginning... all those times I couldn't sleep because my mind was haunting me you were there. All those times I wasn't the best for myself you were there. Its you the one I miss even when you were right in front of me. Its you the one I decided to love even on days I couldn't love myself. Its you, I cherished even on days you couldn't see how great you are. Its you I'd give myself up for, the one I'd decide to love even if it was the first and last time. I loved him from the very beginning... in all those times I've said some pretty fucked up shit, you put up with it no matter how much it hurt you. You always put up with me and I appreciate that. The days when we're good, in sync we had everything we could ever want in each other. The days when we would both go to shit and both our demons would try and rip us apart. Thank you for holding on with me. I loved him from the very beginning... those phases you go through, the good,bad,terrible,sad and even in your worst moments I found peace. Even in those moments where you would haunt yourself, I found the good, I found love, I found you. And that is exactly what I will choose everytime, without a doubt. I will choose you no matter how many times we fuck up. Know that I'm trying. this and many other reasons are why I would say I loved him from the very beginning.
-🖤 L.S.T