Unexpected (Ace Frehley)

may we meet again

I'm on my flight back home and i just wish i can stay longer in Detroit. I know i'm not going to see Ace again and that hotel was the only place i could, for the last time. I don't want to go home, being remembered with all the shit that happened in that tiny appartment. Cause when just one bad thing happenes, i'm not able to see the good things unless i try, but i don't want to try, cause i'm exhausted. It's best that i just get some sleep and put on a fake smile for the camera.

"I'm back". I say to myself, there's no one else to talk to anyway. I look at the kitchen remembering the nights of considering suicide. I let out a sigh and head to the bathroom, looking at myself. Your useless. Stop saying that to yourself Savanna. You shouldn't be doing that. Yeah, i shouldn't be doing a lot of stuff, but i do it anyway. Useless fuck.

I wake up looking around the room, trying to remember what i need to do today. Nothing. Nothing to keep myself distracted, nothing. Well, maybe i can go to the bar for some work. Maybe Jonathan is there again, welcoming me for a little talk.

I head over to the bar and trie to find tony. "Tony, you here?" I say knocking on the door to his office. "Come in". I step inside to see him drinking some coffee. "Oh hey Savanna, how was Detroit?" I sigh remembering again, something i really don't want to. "It wasn't fun. But can i come work tonight?" He gives me a confused look. "What happened, i thought you went there to visit Ace? Also yeah that's okay". "Thank you, Ace and i broke up". He sympethatically looks at me. "What happened, Ace is a good friend of mine". I don't want to make him look bad but i can't lie to Tony. "Also a good friend of mine. Unfortunately we broke up". "Why'd you brake up?" I swallow the lump in my throat. "He cheated on me". The look in his eyes is not easy to be described. Like he had been betrayed but why. "What, he cheated on you? Why would he do that. You are a wonderfull woman". I smile at his compliment. "Thank you Tony. I don't know maybe he got drunk or something". "Make sure you guys talk about it please, you are both very special to me in a different way". I don't think i'll ever be able to have a normal confersation with him again. It may sound dramatic but why would i. It won't make a difference. "I don't know, Tony. But i'll start to clean the toilets right now". Just wanting to get away from this confersation. It's not going to be easy to forget Ace like that. I have become so attached to him and who he is. He trusted me enough to open up on vurnable things and the other way around. The months where i was pregnant were a lot better cause we werent even serious and i couldn't run from my problems by drinking. All i do is run from my problems now. I run from the fact i lost a child. I run from the fact that Ace cheated on me and i run from the fact i'm not happy. I wish i was. A couple of months it all seemed to be going so good. The only reason why i'm still here is because of my friends and family. Everything else has already fallen to pieces and i let it happen. I'm to tired to fix it. It won't be worth it anyway.

I sit down at the table with Jonathan. "Hey, how are you?" I ask trying to start a conversation. "Not good, i found out i'm sick and i won't be able to get better. My time is about to come. After your done with your shift i want to talk to you outside". My heart drops. Please not him. He's to good for this world to be taken away. He stood so happy in his life. Tears well up in my eyes as i trie to speak. "What is wrong. I don't want you to go. Your importand to me. Your the happiest person i know". We look at eachother as he wipes away the tear from my cheeck with a shaking hand, giving me a smile, as his eyes become glassy. "I'm happy to hear you care about me. I care a lot about you too, but you need to stand strong in your own shoes. Im almost seventy and it's natural for me to go. I'm not going to stop it. I know you enough to say that your not the one to make the best choices and your easily mislead with yourself, but you'll come over my death. Someone else's, i wouldn't know, but i sure hope so". Tears flow down my cheecks as i trie to stop it. "How much time do you have left?" He gives me that same sad smile. "This will be the last time we meet". What. "I'm sorry, i'll come back". I quickly make my way to the bathroom, sobbing into my shirt. Why him. I know he's old but why couldn't he be getting a little older. If i ever have kids i want them to call that man uncle. My shirt stained with tears as i wash my face and head back to him. "Why will this be the last time?" "It hurts, Savanna. It hurts when i breath. It hurts when i walk. It hurts when i sleep. I'm going to find a peacefull place to go on my own". I feel the tears over my cheecks. He's going to off himself, i understand that he's in pain and even if i don't want it. It is what's best for him. "Listen, Savanna, you will end your shift and i'll meet you outside". I nod as i dry my tears. Trying to contain myself and finishing the shift.

The whole night went like a disaster, but i don't want it to end, i need to face him and i don't want to.

I step outside the building, heading towards him. He stands next to his car with a smile on his face. "I want you to have this, i know money is tight on you, but this will help you achieve your dreams as i won't be needing it anymore. I want you to do what you want, to be who you are". He hands me an envelope and i open it, seeing a check of 30 000 dollars. "I can't take this, why me?" He grabs my hand, looking into my eyes. "You can keep everything, you can keep a part of it and you can give it all away. I don't care. I know you'll do what is right. Now listen to me. You're life isn't the smoothest, but it makes you stronger and you will be happy eventually. This life is the only one you get, so why end it so quickly, Savanna. I know you see this as the only way out, but give it some time. If five years pass and you still feel like this. I can't blame you. All i want, is for you to find happyness in yourself. I know telling you this won't magically make it go away, but it's treu. No one can help you but yourself. Other people can give you a will to hold on, but you pull the strings. Don't throw life away like that, please". I burst into tears as he continues his speech, pointing at my heart. "That in there, is the only one in the world like it. No one else has one like yours. You're heart is unique, beautifull, but can also be a dark place to hide. Don't trie to run from it anymore. Face your fears. Talk to the people you love, before it's to late. Time goes faster than you think. Take care of yourself, Savanna. You are a beautifull person and it was a pleasure i was able to meet you. I love you". The tears keep on coming as i hold onto his hand for dear life. I embrace him in a hug, crying on his shoulder, as he returns it. "I love you, i'm going to miss you so, so much, but i'm not going to stop you. I don't want you to suffer. It was a pleasure meeting you and talking to you. You're really importand to me. You make me a better person. I want to thank you for that. I love you, i will miss you, i really will". I cry on his shoulder as the minutes pass. When you know it's the last time, you don't want it to end. All the dear memories i hold with him, everything he has helped me trough, if it wasn't for him, i wouldn't be standing here right now. He pulls away, holding my hand again. "It will be okay, eventually, Savanna. May we meet again, but not to soon". His soft smile, making me cry even harder. "May we meet again". He lets go of my hand, stepping into his car. The last smile of him, it will be plasted in my brain as long as i live. I wave at him, crying, as he drives away. Looking back with the same smile. Everything comes crashing to the ground around me. I run home, sobbing and not being able to stop. The purest soul i've ever met, has to go this way, in pain. I would never want that for him. I wish he can live longer. I look over at the knife in the kitchen. No, give it time, don't let him down like that. Crying, i lay my head against the pillow of my bed. I don't want to wake up again, i hate this, i hate being here, i hate that he will be gone forever. I'm going to miss you. May we meet again.