The Fertility Switch

 Jim and Nat had been married for ten years, but despite extensive attempts, they were still childless. Both of them had good jobs and a comfortable life, but this one fact clouded everything. For the first several years they were able to enjoy a fair bit of travelling, thanks to their wealth, and so had postponed starting a family. When they finally made the decision, they found themselves unable to get pregnant. All of their friends and family had children, and so social occasions were increasingly uncomfortable for them – and of course, with every year that passed, their desperation increased.

Finally, they submitted themselves for a series of tests to detect the underlying problem. Today was the day that they were to learn of the results of the test, and whether there was a solution to their situation.

Jim was a six-foot tall former football player who now worked in financial markets. His wife Nat was an attractive middle-aged woman with honey blonde hair who was partners in a catering company.

Their doctor welcomed them into her office. The couple was nervous as they took their seats, Jim biting his lip worriedly and Nat looking over in concern at him.

"I'll try to get right to the point," Dr. Michaelson said. First off, I'd like to congratulate both of you for being in tip-top shape. You both have a great body weight, your vitals are great, and you're in prime condition for your age."

'That's great," Jim remarked. "But can we get to the reason we're here?"

The doctor paused, biting her lip. She had dealt with this type of guy as million times. Oh well, she thought, he's in a lot of stress.

"Okay, well, of course our main focus here was on the reproductive organs. You'll be happy to know, both of you, that Nat's reproductive organs are in great shape, and fully capable of forming life," she explained to them.

Nat sighed with relief and visibly relaxed.

"So what's the problem then?" Jim angrily demanded.

"Your organs are are fine, too," the Dr. said. "The problem is with your sperm. Your sperm count during ejaculation is so exceedingly low as to be practically non-existent."

"Does this mean – " Nat began.

"It means I'm infertile – right, doctor?" Jim asked, scowling.

"Well, not completely infertile," the Dr. said. "It's just that you're not..."

She paused, searching for the word...

"Virile," Jim said bitterly.

"Well, yes," the Dr. said, smiling slightly, "in strictly the medical sense of that term."

"I guess that settles that, then!" Jim snarled. "We can't have kids cause I'm not manly enough!"

"I don't think that's what the doctor's saying, Jim," Nat said placatingly, reaching to touch him on the arm.

He shook her hand off coldly, refusing her comfort – and what he took as her pity.

"There are of course, options you can consider," Dr. Michaelson said. "For instance, a sperm donor..."

"Does that mean I'd have to sleep with another man?" Nat asked. "Of course, I don't really want to, but if you want me to, Jim..." she said, looking over at her husband.

"Of course, it doesn't mean that," Jim grumbled sourly. "It means doing with it a turkey baster, the way lesbians do."

"It's not a turkey baster, but yes, there are other ways to become inseminated rather than through intercourse," the doctor said.