Unexpected (Ace Frehley)

lie

I wake up on the floor looking at myself in the mirror. I feel better, just a little bit. But it's a difference. I get ready for an importand shoot. It feels different, like i really want to go there this time.

The shoot went fantastic and i think they liked me. My smile this time wasn't forced.

I head to the store. I want to thank Tony and Alexa. I havent been the easiest person to deal with, but i want to trie and fix that.

"Tony?" He peeks around the corner. "What are you doing here it's 2pm?" "I want to thank you, i did what you told me to and i feel better, i think. So i brought you something but i need to go again, i'm heading to Alex". I put the small box on the bar as he gives me a smile and i wave him goodbye. I walk down the streets to Alex and make it to her door. I have keys, but i don't know if Stevens here so i knock. The door slowly opens, revealing Alex looking sleepy. "Geez, what happened to you?" She laughs a little before letting me in. "Whatcha doing here?" I hand her some flowers i bought and a box of chocolates. "I don't really know how to thank you. It woul've been easier if i knew what to buy and i don't care about the price of it. But what i'm here for is. I want to thank you. I'm not an easy person and you, you have been so caring and patient with me. I'm really thankful that you've put up with me all this time". Her smile grows wide and she embraces me in a hug. "It's okay, i love you and i will always be here for you". I hug her back, smiling. "Thank you. I will for you too, always". We stand in a moment of good silence. It will be okay after all. It isn't that bad.

A month passes. Life's been good to me and i'm happy again. I don't plan on falling of again. I'm going after my dreams. I've gotten a manager and i'll be traveling all over the world. Doing runway, normal shoots and intervieuws. If i get enough money i think i'll even buy myself a house. Even tho i'm gonna miss this appartment it'll be good for me. I've said goodbye to my job and to Tony. I'll be visting, i want to come back to catch up with him sometime and Alex, like always, patient and happy.

It's two months later. I've made it big. I've made some great money and made myself, friends and family proud.

I sit in the appartment. I'm going to move. It's finally happening. I look around my room and start packing. When i realise that i don't even have this much stuff. It's Ace's Oh no. Shit shit shit, no everytime i go to see him i end up getting hurt and now he just left all his stuff here and i have to put up with it. I pace around to room, stressfully. Okay Savanna. Your fine. Just call Bill and ask for Ace's new number.

I look at the phone in my hands. Just call it. Just call it. Just call it. Just call Bill. I put the phone to my ear. "Hello?" I inhale a shakey breath. "Hey Bill, it's Savanna, i don't know if you still remember me, but i was wondering if you happen to have Ace's number for me?" A small silence passes. "Ace it's for you". Wait what. No. I'm not ready to talk to him yet. No. Shit. "Hello, who's this?" I begin heavily breathing. "U-uhm, it's Savanna..". He falls completely silent. "Ace, i'm going to be moving out of the appartment and your stuff is still here. Can you be able to come and get it?" I feel a tear roll down my cheeck. Mostly because of stress, but also because of him, just him. "Oh". I try not to make a sound. "When do you want me to get it?" "When are you free?" "I'll stop by this week somewhere, goodbye". With that he hangs up the phone and i realise that i've been lying to myself all along. I really do miss him. More than anything. I've just tried to ignore it, cause he was the only problem i couldn't deal with, so i decided not to face it. I break down, sliding down the wall, crawling against it. Why can't my feelings for him just go away. I don't want anymore problems. Eveytime we fuck up, i lose myself. He was the eye of the storm. When your inside, it's so peacefull, but when your on the outside, it's horrible. I don't want this again, but i do want him. I need him. I want him to be mine again. I want to feel safe the way i do when i'm with him. I want the reasurance. I want him and no one else. The tears flow down my cheecks. I can't take this. Please get me out. Please.