To Love *The Maze Runner/Newt Fanfic*

Chapter 35

~~Quick Author's Notes~~~

I just want to quickly apologize for not updating sooner (I'm going to explain why at the end of the chapter haha.) It makes me so sad to not post for over two weeks!!

BUT anyway, I tagged a video/song to go along with this chapter because it's goes so well with the overall feeling of the next few updates! Idk and its kind of an unknown artist or at least I'd never heard it before. Yah but enjoy this chapter, its slightly saddening and I'm sorry for that, but don't worry happy chapters are coming.

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~~~Brianne's POV~~~

The night was cold and the feeling of death seemed to linger over everything I looked at. I'd barely stopped crying and it was currently 4:15 in the morning. It was still dark out and the candles that I'd lit hours ago had already burnt out, but the darkness was strangely comforting.

I heard the door open behind me, but I didn't turn around. Whoever it was wasn't important right now.

"You awake, over there?" It was Jeff. Probably just checking in on me like Nick wanted him to. Is that really what I've become: a child that needs to be checked on? I'm not five, Nick.

"Yah." I blinked rapidly, pushing the oncoming tears away. This was the dreaded emotional stage in the process of mourning an unhappy occurrence. Pretty soon the stage of silence would come and that scared me more than ever. Cursing and crying is sometimes less disturbing than silence. Silence can be deadly, as I've found out today. Newt had been pretty silent about his depression and I mean, look where that got him.

I felt a hand on my upper back, but I didn't move. I sat still, eyes focused on Newt. Jeff kneeled beside me, he, too, staring.

"I'm sorr-" He started.

"Don't." I stopped the pitiful words that were about to fall from his lips. I didn't need them. Or more importantly, Newt didn't need them.

Jeff sighed next to me, "Can I do anything to help?"

"Help who?"

"Well, both of you. It's not my job tonight, but I can help you." I shifted my vision over to Jeff. His dark brown eyes were filled with kindness. He wanted to help us. But unfortunately there was nothing he could do.

I couldn't even help this situation and I'd been the closest to Newt.

"No, it's okay." I whispered.

After a few seconds of silence, "You're positive he wasn't stung by a shucking griever?"

"Yah, I'm sure." My heart ached. It hadn't really clicked yet, that the state Newt was in right now, was self-afflicted, but like I said before, it would all sink in pretty soon. The mind works wonders when left with its own thoughts for too long.

Jeff shook his head adamantly, "I just don't understand what happened out there? Something awful, thats for sure."

"He tried to kill himself," My mind screamed.

"Yah," I replied, keeping things simple. Sometimes simpler is better; not everyone understands pain.

"I wish I knew, so I could help him."

I wish I knew too. But I don't. And that scares me. What do I say to Newt when he wakes up- I mean, if he wakes up? How exactly do I express my care while suppressing my anger. I love him, it's just this isn't okay. He can't do this again.

I refocused my attention back on Newt. A cut above his eyebrow still hadn't stopped bleeding. The blood dripped slowly down his temple. I felt the urge to wipe it away, but decided against it since Jeff was here.