Unexpected (Ace Frehley)

can i?

I wake up, looking around the room, luckily there's light. Ace isn't laying beside me. My fear grows, thinking about my dream. My hands shake as i reach the doorhandle. I twist it, peeking thro the hole, i take a couple of steps towards the stairs, feeling the goosebumps rise up onto my neck, my walking turns into a sprint, heading for the kitchen, my heart relaxes as i see Ace standing there. "What's wrong Sav?" He asks with a soft expression on his face as he walks over to me, slipping his arms around my waist. I burrie my head in his chest, relaxing at his touch. "I feel save with you". His soft lips connect with mine as relieve passes over me. "But serious, what's stressing you this much?" He says, looking me in my eyes. I swallow the lump in my throat. "I- i". Do i tell him? What if he thinks i'm just looking for attention? "Hmm?". "No it's just, i'm really happy that you're seven days clean right now". I really am, altough it's just an excuse right now. "Thank you, but don't use that as an excuse, just tell me". I feel reassured, but i take my distance from him and sit down. He looks at me with a frown on his face, sitting down across from me. I'm telling him? Wich parts do i tell him? I trie to think back about everything. Everything. I trie my best to speak, no words come out. I want to tell him how i really feel, but i just can't speak. "I- i- i head a really bad dream last night, i was crying on the kitchen floor, right there, it was, weird". He places a hand over mine, whilst his facial expressions change from confusion to worried. "you're really cold". I shrug. "I'm worried about you, but i understand, what happened yesterday was, it was different you know". I pull my hand back from his hand and lay my head down on the table. I don't want to do this anymore, i want it to all end, even if i trie to explain, i can't it doesn't work. No matter how hard i trie, nothing ever changes. I'm stuck on an endless road, without a light to hold onto. I'm exhausted to say the least and if hallucinations are coming with it too, i can't take it. Last night was terrifying, i never felth that way. It was different, the last thing i remember are those words. 'Nobody can help you but yourself' it's treu. I don't know what said it to me, but it's right, i'm the only one able to help myself and i've tried every way possible and i can't. I just can't. The tears flow and i let them. Ace has his hand on my back as he hugs me, doing his best to help. "I'm so sorry Ace". I say, feeling the salt of my tears on my tongue. "Savanna, what are you sorry for, you've done nothing wrong". "I'm going to".

We sit down on the couch, wrapped in blankets, watching a movie. The rain making soft noices as it falls down on the ground. "Ace". He looks at me with his smile, the same smile that cringles aroung his eyes, the same smile that hold so many memories and the same smile that i'll forever love. "I love you". I say looking him in his eyes. His sweet smile grows even wider. "I love you too". He says while pulling me closer to him again. His lips attach to mine, making me melt. It's different this time. I sit on his lap, moving with him in sync. His hands are wrapped tightly around my waist, as mine dangle in his soft hair. He smiles against me and i can't help but too. I love him with my whole heart. I want to fucking marrie him and raise kids together as we grow old and when we're sixty we play guitar in our dusty appartment. Fuck that's what i want, but how are we ever going to do that.