Unexpected (Ace Frehley)

unexpected

"Hey Alex, i was just calling to see how you are doing?" "Oh yeah i've been great, how are you?" "That's good to hear, i've been good too, i haven't seen you in a while, maybe we should go out with the four of us next week, are you guys free then?" "Oh that's great, yeah we're free". "Okay, i'll call you back so we can plan a date, i love you Alex". She let's out a little laugh. "I love you too Sav".

I lay in bed next to Ace, he has his arms around me and his head burried in the crook of my neck. I watch how he smiles, keeping his eyes closed. "Goodnight, Savanna, i love you". He murmers into my neck. I plant a kiss on his lips, watching his curl back into a smile again. "I love you too, Paul Daniel Frehley", i smile at the sight infront of me, feeling myself slowly dip into sleep.

I wake up, looking around the dark room, Ace not near me. I feel fear creep up in me, as i stand up out of the bed. I twist the door handle, peeking thro the gab. I quietly walk down the stairs, feeling goosebumps grow up on my back. My walk turns into running, as i head for the kitchen. "Ace?" i speak, fumbling for the lightswitch in the dark, witch seems to be gone. The fear grows even more then it already is. "ACE WHERE ARE YOU". i look around the kitchen in the pitch black, nothing to see. I start heavily breathing, as the air becomes thicker. My sight is blocked out as i stumble around in the dark in the kitchen. My back hits the kitchen counter and i slide down. No, no, no, this can't be happening, not again. I crie as i put my hands in my hair, pulling my knees to my chest. The sensation, i'm paranoid. My eyes desprately look around the kitchen for a light in the distance. "ACE" i wrap my hands around me knees, the tears stream down my face, my body shaking as i flinch of the touch of Ace's hands. "What's wrong?" I look into his eyes, as i claw my nails in his arm. "I'm going- i'm going insane, help me". "It's alright, there's nothing". "NO, ACE, PLEASE, THERE IS, HELP ME" waves going down my cheecks, as Ace slowly fades from my sight again. "no, NO, NOT AGAIN". My breathing out of control, as i feel to cold floor of the kitchen, picking up Ace's ashes. "HELP ME". I scream at the top of my lungs, but it feels like i'm being held down again. "Please". I whisper into the black, only to hear something unplaceable whisper back to me. "No one can help you but yourself".

I shoot up, sitting up on the bed, tears rolling down my face. Ace sitting up next to me, grabbing my hand, full force. "What's wrong, Savanna". His hand squeezes mine as tight as possiple as his eyes grow dark, dark black, his body transforming into fading figures that hold on to me. I pull my hand back, falling of the bed, running into the dark hallway, i run down the stairs, all black figures screaming at me. "TIME". "NO ONE CAN HELP YOU BUT YOURSELF". The rest screaming, like they're burning. I run down the stairs, into the kitchen, not being able to break out of the loop, not eveb like i have a choice, it just happens. I slide down the kitchen counter, looking in the pitch black, looking for a licht. "Please help me, i'm so scared, please, anyone". The feeling of nails, scratching in my back, screaming at me. "NO ONE CAN HELP YOU BUT YOURSELF".

I shoot up out of the bed, screaming, tears rolling down my face. I run as fast as i can, running into the kitchen. Everything is pitch black, the people screaming at me. I breath heavily, as i pick up a knife. "No one can help you but yourself". I close my eyes as i push it thro my stomach. The screaming stopping, and the light comes back to me. Ace standing in the doorway. "What-what have you done?" Horror written on his face, as i look down, feeling the stabbing pain. "Fuck". The tears still streaming down my face, as i stumble backwards. Ace calling an ambulance, giving them the adress. It's all blurry. I sit against the counter whispering "I'm sorry Ace". "Why". Tears spilling from his eyes. Everything suddendly feels like my mind flashes. It's so easy. "I can't do it anymore" . I cough, seeing blood down my legs. I guess i always had a thing for knives, a thing not even drugs could fix for me. i was happy again, all the relieve it gave me, but after a while i didn't feel that anymore. I quit and got myself almost killed two times, the adrenaline felt so good. I wasn't even scared. He shakes his head. "Hold on, please, i don't want you to die". He chokes out, holding my hand and trying his best to stop the blood. I want to finish what i never could. The blood stains my shirt and pants as i feel it, but it feels so good. I never want it to stop. I moved to New York to see if there was more to life then i knew, it was great at first, but a new start can't fix an old mind. I did it again, standing with the knife in my hands, it didn't get better, it would be okay for a month and would go back to this. When Assey was lost it got even worse but i didn't do it because Jonathan told me to give it some time, but then the dreams came. "They aren't just dreams, they're so real Ace". I put my hand to my mouth, coughing up blood. "They scream at me, they are what i am, what i'm doing to myself. i'm so fucking scared, i can't take it anymore". It's been given enough time. All the feelings, flashing memories come and go thro my brain. It doesn't even hurt. I'm happy, i'm so happy. "I am sorry, i am. I never told you, never told my family, never told my friends. I couldn't the words wouldn't leave my mind. It became to much to take". I breath out, the light in the dark is finally found, i helped myself. "Tell my family and friends i love them. I love you Ace, never doubt that. I love you". The tears flowing down his cheecks. "No, you're going to make it, Savanna". His hand holds mine as i pull him in for a last kiss. It feels different when you know it's the last time. "I love you Savanna". I crack a smile feeling it become lighter and better. My eyes close and i find peace for the first in a very long time. This is happiness, i am happy. After everything that happens, sometimes you have to expect the unexpected.