Darker Dreams (ONE SHOT)

Part 1/1

Chris' POV

It was late. The clock on the nightstand's readout displayed 2:18am, and yet I couldn't sleep. Something about tonight would be different. My thoughts were all over the place, making absolutely no sense. I knew why sleep eluded me. The memories of that day wouldn't leave my head, no matter how I tried. The medics, the scene that I'd come upon when I got the call...my closest friends, Ricky and Justin, had been involved in a car crash. It wasn't a very pretty one. Those memories flooded my mind now, pushing past all those officers and getting scolded for entering a crime scene. A man, dressed in dark clothing and makeup, making himself a fool. Scraping my knees on the concrete, as I came to the realization that the body laying outside the car was none other than the one I loved most.

Richard Olson.

Tears sprang to my eyes now, but I quickly pushed them away with my tattooed fingers. Justin had survived, miraculously, but every time we made eye contact, I only saw Ricky. They'd pronounced him dead on the scene, right in front of me, before I was pulled away by officers that had been trying for several minutes now to pull me from my stupor off the concrete. I remembered the blood, the lifeless look in his eyes...I could see in them that he'd been scared for his life. Justin tried endlessly to apologize to me, even though it wasn't his fault. Someone had T-boned them going 60, and flipped the car. Ricky had crawled out of the car to try and call for help, but since he'd lost so much blood, there was no way to save him in time. The memory of his face was still burned into my memory...

Staring up at the ceiling in the darkness of my room, I longed to hear Ricky's voice one more time. Taking a deep breath, I finally managed to bring my sight back to the clock on the nightstand. 2:42am. I knew I needed to get some sleep, otherwise I'd pay for it in the morning. The funeral service was held the next week after his death was announced - standing there beside his burial plot, was when I lost it. I refused to view his body, because it would have been another reminder that he was gone. Another reminder that I would never get to hear his laugh or his beautiful singing voice. Shifting beneath the sheets, I laid my head against my pillow, thoughts of that night drifting in my head.

It was quiet. Too quiet. Darkness surrounded me, though just up ahead, I could see a faint bright light. I headed that way, wondering just where my mind had taken me. As I walked closer, I could hear faint sounds of someone talking, whether it was directed at me or not, I didn't know. The darkness around me lifted, replaced with a clear blue sky. Odd, considering my dreams were always darker than this. A stutter in my step signaled that this dream seemed vaguely familiar, and as the scene unfolded in front of me, I understood that it was none other than the scene that I'd kept revisiting in my head. The medics surrounding the area, police blocking off the whole scene with caution tape, and directly in front of me stood Ricky, a smile on his lips as he saw me.

"Chris. You made it." His voice was heavenly, almost brought me to my knees. Almost woke me back up from sleep. "I thought you wouldn't come."

"H-how?" I managed, looking around myself in disbelief. The scene seemed too real, like I was reliving that day all over again. "You...you're..."

"Gone. I know." Ricky spoke simply, like he was at peace. There was no hesitation, no slip of his voice like I used to know. The only thing familiar about him was his dark clothing he'd been wearing the day he died. A sigh of relief left my lips at that. "I came back to sort out some unfinished business."

"Unfinished what?" I spoke dumbfoundedly, like I had misheard him or something. The ringing in my ears had been blurring the words Ricky was saying, between the real world and the veil of the dead. Briefly, I wondered if I was able to send the dead off in my dreams, or have some sort of psychic ability. "What do you need to finish?"

The dark haired man just laughed and moved closer, the space between us getting thinner until he was mere inches from my face. Could I touch him? I felt my heartbeat pick up, doing double time until his hand reached for my face. I couldn't face this...he was about to tell me he was in love with me. I knew it. "You. My unfinished business is with you, Motionless."

His hand finally reached his destination, a ghostly touch among the living, but all the same I felt it. Leaning into his hand, I felt the overwhelming sensations of what I knew back in the living, but nothing came. Instead, it left as soon as it came. I didn't understand at all. How was he here with me? Where had he come from? Did we all just have a restless afterlife? Buried in the ground with nowhere to go? "Ricky..." I started, but before I could get any more words out, he pulled me down and kissed me.

This had been all I wanted back when he was alive, but now that he was kissing me here, just the ghostly feel of one, I wanted to wake up and never revisit the memories again. I decided to give in and kiss him back. It felt otherworldly, something that I could never have in the life I had now, and it was intoxicating. I couldn't stop, holding onto a person that would forever have my heart, even in the afterlife. As soon as we both pulled away, my heart shattered into pieces, knowing that he'd leave and I'd be left to feel his absence. "I'm sorry I didn't get to tell you when I was alive, but I do love you, Christopher. My heart will always be yours."

Hearing him say those words comforted me, which in turn left Ricky at a crossroads. It would be his moment to leave me completely alone. Instead, he stayed, taking my hand and holding it as tight as he could. He didn't say anything, but directed us back the way I came. The scene behind us started to dim, fading into nothing but blackness. The familiarity of this darkness scared me more than I was willing to admit, but appearing before us both were the cemetery-like gates that I'd passed through to find him. And that was where Ricky stopped, glowing like a glow stick in my patch of darkness. I took one last look of him, healthy and smiling, like he used to be and suddenly, my hesitations of leaving him faded. It had been like walking with death. "I'll always remember those words. I'll never love anyone else like I love you, Richard Olson."

A smile appeared on his lips, and one last time, Ricky pulled my hand up. I knew what he was doing, and allowed him to kiss my knuckles. The sensations here were very different than the ones in the living, but he then took a step back. Something was pulling him, causing him to fade in front of my eyes. "Ricky!" I shouted, reaching for him. It was too late, though, and I understood vaguely that he had gone to pursue whatever it was that spirits did. Swallowing hard, I very steadily walked through the cemetery gates, hearing them swing shut behind me. The memory would be gone, and I would be left with a stinging, searing loneliness. Another bright light shone across the darkness that surrounded me, and I realized that the sun had rose.

Wake up, Chris. It's time to let go...

As my eyelids opened, the fatigue of the dream weighed me down. Something that I hardly ever experienced. The ghostly sensations that were felt in my dream were still plaguing me, and with the realization that Ricky was now absolutely gone and there was no coming back from this, my eyes welled with tears and for the first time in a long time, I sobbed. I wept for what could have been, and since it was just me in the house, I allowed myself to be a mess of a human being. As soon as I was able to calm down and accept that he was now where he needed to be, I took a deep breath once more, startled by a text message that had come to my phone. I picked it up, and read it, a small smile reaching across my lips.

[text]: Hey, Chris, it's Justin. You're not alone - I've got you. When you're ready to talk, I'll be waiting.