The Shores of God, Traitors Gold

Chapter Five

It was so strange to have another woman abroad. Although we didn't see much of her for the first couple of hours after our introduction, simply just knowing that she was present was enough to rattle us. Dell was constantly making ludicrous jokes, which wasn't that unusual, but was beginning to tickle my nerves. Field kept asking strange questions about the girl "Do you think she's board?" "Do you think she likes rum or tea better?" "Do girls drink rum?" Field was almost worse than Dell. Forest and Gulch never really mentioned Fillianna, only speaking of her when asked directly. Crag took to nonstop complaining.

"What do you think?" Forest asked. He was standing in an on-guard position. I looked him up and down.

"What do I think of what?"

"My position, am I balanced or too far forward?" I shook my head, he was always asking us how he could better himself, at least when it came to the art of the sword.

"Your balanced." I assured him.

"Maybe it's my sword?" Forest asked himself.

I looked around for someone else to converse with but was unlucky to find them all dispersed. I walked to the bow and settled myself in the left corner. Somehow I felt very alone, which shouldn't be because I had the company of my family, yet still lonely I was. I lifted my face towards the sky and closed my eyes. Taking a deep breath, my mind began to wonder. What if I left? What if I finally started to search for my own adventure? My mother would be devastated, so that was out of the question. What if I just stayed at home and built her a new house? Surely she wouldn't object to that? Or maybe I should... no not that! I ran through a thousand more possibilities but didn't succeed. Before long I drifted off towards what I hoped was a restful nap, very unlikely.

~"Moore! Come on Moore!" Atoll yelled as he ran in my direction drawing his sword.

I laughed, "let's fight!" Atoll and I ran towards each other and our sharp, very real, blades collided. Our battle was fierce and unhindered by our brotherly love, I took every opportunity to strike him, he did likewise. As we fought we traveled along the deck and my pride began to swell within.

I smiled as I swung my sword toward Atolls head he ducked but as he did I caught a glimpse of Lizzy leaning over the ships edge.

"ATOLL!!" I yelled dropping my sword and pointing toward Lizzy. He turned just in time to see Lizzy tumble over the edge. But he just stood there, Atoll didn't move.

"NO!" I yelled.

"Elizabeth?" Lizzy's mother called walking slowly on deck, she began to look for her daughter. She looked at Atoll and smiled but Atoll did nothing back. She turned her head toward the edge, then let out a shrill scream. My heart began to race and my blood flowed cold.

"NO!" I screamed as loud as I could manage, my limbs were frozen with fear. "NO NANCY, NO!" I was too late Nancy too was lost to the edge~

I sat in my little corner, eyes wide open my breathing was heavy. Just a dream. But it wasn't, it really happened. I just don't understand why God allowed me to have such terrible dreams. I shouldn't even remember that day, I was so young. Uh! Why? It wasn't fair of him to do this to me. Or was it? Maybe this was what I deserved for letting her die? So that was the truth, this was my punishment for hurting her, I wish it was worse, I deserved something much worse. I should have died, not Mesa, me. And now this dream, Nancy, Little Lizzy? Did I really deserve to watch them die?

I single tear fell from my eye and I knew that I couldn't bear to do this any longer. I would have to end the dreams or else end everything else. I deserved to die anyway? Why not? Maybe I would get lucky and run into pirates?

"Don't isolate yourself." I heard Atoll's voice in my head, he would know. And maybe he was right, guess I can't even nap alone anymore, ya!

I shook my head in hopes of somehow clearing it, and mounted my feet. I sighed, I would have to practice being around people, give myself less time to think and I might make it, I didn't need God to fix my problems. Not that I didn't love God I just don't need him right now, besides I am saved right? that's all there is to it, I think. Although Cliff always seems to be happy and he says that he has "the joy of the Lord" whatever that means? My mother likewise has incredible patience and says that it's one the fruits of the spirit, I didn't know that God was that fond of fruit. I had neither of those "fruits".