Still Love You|| J-hope oneshot

Oneshot

A/n Pov

She was crying. She was crying again while hugging her knees. It's the 10th time she is crying in a day. She has been crying since 1 hour. Everyone thinks she is fine but only herself knows she is not. She is depressed. She can't sleep at night. This day also went like other days, crying, being messy, depressed and many things. She can't figure out what's going on in her life but she is just living. She stopped crying and washed her face and decided to do a Vlive. Yes she is an idol. A very known k-pop idol. She started her live when she felt better and tried not to cry anymore. 1k views, 5k, 7k, 10k views. Then she finally started reading comments. One comment caught her eye!

End of Pov

Y/n's Pov
I was reading comments on my Vlive. My Brighters (her fandom name as her group name is Bright) are really so sweet they always make me feel happy, make me feel alive, make me feel worth it. They are the only reason I am living till now otherwise I had not. When I was reading comments, one comment caught my eye. It was written "Have you ever loved someone or do you love someone? If yes then dedicate a song to them." I read it aloud and memories started hitting me.
The memories which are beautiful but one memory is there which still hurts me. It's been 5 years but I still love him. Why do I still love you??

*Flashback*
5 years earlier

"Y/n~ah I wanna say something". He said. "Yes", she replied while playing with his hair. "Actually I wanna say that". He was playing with his fingers and hesitating. "Hobi~ah what happened? Tell me don't worry", she replied seeing him worried. "Actually le-let's brea-break-breakup", he said to her while shuttering. Of course it was not easy for him to say this, she meant the world to him but then why does he want to leave her world? "Ho-hobi wh-what Ar-are yo-you trying to sa-say? WHY ARE YOU SAYING THIS? WHY YOU WANT BREAKUP OUT OF THE BLUE?? JUST FUCKING WHY?" She said to him while crying, "Just, I can't tell the reason but I just wa-want to break up", he also said while crying. "OK FINE LET'S DO WHAT YOU WANT BUT KNOW ONE THING YOU'RE GONNA REGRET IT!" She said to him while crying and went from there running. "I am sorry love, I am sorry for this, I am sorry for all the pain I caused to you". He said while crying.

After that she went home & laid down on the floor after closing the door and started crying while hugging her knees. She was hurt, she was not in the state to do anything. But then she suddenly remembered that her parents are coming today. So she got up and freshened herself. She went to the airport, when she went there she heard the news that Flight XXX had crashed, it was the same flight in which her parents were coming. This was the moment her world completely broke down. Her legs started trembling, she fell down on the floor as her legs didn't support her. She was a crying mess. She felt that she had no one in her life, she felt that she had no reason to live now.

She didn't lose herself, she thought of going to Han River for some fresh air. When she went there she thought about her life which she thought was miserable but little did she know what was coming for her. Then she decided not to give up on her life but to fulfil her dreams for which she came to South Korea.

After that incident she completely broke down because of two heartbreaks. First Hobi broke up with her and then her Eomma and Appa left her alone in this cruel world. After that incident she became completely depressed and started taking anti-depression pills and sleeping pills also. She applied for an audition of k-pop idol and by her dancing and singing skills she got selected. After being a trainee for 2 years she debuted with 4 more members, their group name was BRIGHT

End of Flashback

She came out of her thoughts and saw many comments asking her if she is alright or not. Because unknowingly a drop of tear escaped her eye by remembering about her past. Then she replied to that comment saying "Yes, I also loved someone, I loved them from the bottom of my heart but they left me alone. So I will dedicate this song to them" Then she picked up her guitar and started singing "Main Tumhara" song. Yes she is Indian! The lyrics completely matched her situation (if you want you all can listen to it and see the lyrics). She finished singing and put her guitar beside. Then she read more comments and replied to all of them. After sometime the live ended.

Y/n's Pov
After the Vlive ended I thought about going to my favourite place which is the Han River. Whenever my parents came to South Korea they took me to the Han River and whenever me and Hobi wanted to go somewhere we always came to the Han River. Unknowingly a drop of tear again escaped from my eye. Whenever I think about them I don't know why but I always end up being sad and nothing else. I suddenly saw a familiar figure standing there. I can't recognise it but I think I saw him somewhere but where I can't remember it!!

Then that man or boy started coming towards me when he saw me. I was not scared but confused as to why he was coming towards me. Then out of nowhere he asked me "Are you Y-Y/n?? The man said. That voice, this voice looks similar to him, the voice which I was dying to hear, I finally got to hear after fucking 5 years but I can't forget the pain he gave to me. Do you know me? I replied to him, First tell me, are you really y/n? He again asked Yes I am Y/n, I replied to him. "Y-Y/n I can't belie-believe that you are standing right in front of me", he said while crying. I can't see him cry, I am weak, I am surely weak for him but I can't do anything. "Didn't you recognise me?" He asked me, "I did, I did recognise you after hearing your voice", I replied to him. "Y-Y/n I wanna say that I am sorry, I know I did very wrong to you, I should not have left you without telling the reason". He said while crying, "Ohh you know?" I replied sarcastically, "Y/n please forgive me and I wanna say something. I wanna say that I still LOVE YOU", he said out of nowhere, I still could not process anything.

I also loved him very much, more than myself and I still do but how can I forget the pain he gave me. The person because of whom I am suffering this much. Unknowingly a tear again dropped off my eyes. Sorry, I can't forgive you because of the things you caused me. Because of the pain you gave, because of the depression, anxiety, over-thinking that I am suffering from only because of you. And I don't think I would be able to love you after all of this. "I am sorry", I said while crying. "I am sorry Y/n~ah, I am really sorry only because of me you have to go through this much and I got to know about your parents too. I am sorry, I am really sorry. I am regretting my decision." He said while crying.

With that we both parted our ways in different directions while crying. Till now we both were a crying mess .I still love him but can't forget the pain that he caused to me.

End of Pov

They both didn't move on from each other and neither loved someone else, because they promised not to love someone else till the time they will love each other.

A/n: He left her because his dream was to become an idol and there was a rule that he can't date. That's why he had to break up with her.

Someone said right:
Every story doesn't have a happy ending but if our love is true then if we can't live with them we can live with their memories. Same goes for both of them. They both were not living together but with the memories of their happy time!! This shows they truly love each other

Member: J-hope
Title: Still Love You
Date: 28 Sep, 2022
Words: 1498