Alyssa Vernal and The Lost Treasure: Everything Wrong

1. Alyssa Vernal

To be honest, until now, I still like how I wrote Alyssa. In the book she always seemed curious, and asked lots of questions about things she didn't know (though some of the questions were unnecessary so it made her straight-up annoying). As for things she knew, it was described as "familiar" to her.
Overall, a really interesting mind she has.
But the way her cleverness was portrayed...I honestly don't know how to describe it.
The way she said "let's climb this mountain!!!" isn't exactly the best plan for you all to complete the quest. Yes, you should climb the mountain, but without thinking what you should do first? She could've just said "Okay, we need a plan, because this will be pretty risky." then proceeds to ask Enna if her teleportation wand is working, instead of suddenly thinking that they should go climb the mountain with no preparation whatsoever. It wasn't even stated if they knew how to climb a mountain, so... what the actual heck? Alyssa, you shouldn't immediately assume that both Enna and Zalina have experience on climbing a goshdang mountain, especially since THEY NEVER STATED IT THEMSELVES.

 
Here's the worst part- despite Enna and Zalina knowing that they DON'T have experience on climbing mountains, they still go along with the new girl whose royal parent is unknown, and none of them call her out for assuming that.
Alyssa is supposed to be the smart and responsible one, yet she goes "let's climb this mountain even though we don't know how!!1!1!1!1!".

And yes, before you ask - they are lost princesses, and in my words (or in Zalina's words) that makes them "less royal", because they learn a lot of things in the castle and even train their powers, but I never made it canon that they trained how to climb a mountain (or how to climb in general). That's the problem. They go on dangerous quests that could possibly get them killed (at some point) yet their training lacks (Screw you, Queen Angelica.) I mean... before they even arrived at the Diamond Mountain, you might think that Alyssa - being the smart one - will think of a plan and prepare some materials to climb a mountain. But no. She just went along with Zalina and Enna, even though they said it was their first time getting a quest.

Here's the quote: 

She guessed she must've been too sleepy to pack her things up. She was also in a hurry. She asked her friends  about it.

Enna shrugged. "You'll get provided soon enough. Besides, I don't really see that much packing in this quest. All we have to do is retrieve Queen Angelica's crown. Nothing risky about it. I guess we'll have to pack our wands."

Nothing risky about it. That's what Enna says. It would've been understandable if all they had to do was get in a room and grab the crown, but they're climbing a literal mountain and she's saying that's it's not risky? Of course it is, Enna. You're only 12, so you know nothing about climbing mountains, and you definitely don't know anything about quests because this is your first one. YOU EVEN STATED IT YOURSELF.

(Also, does anyone find it weird how I made Alyssa think they're friends? I mean, she just met these people... was I that lonely before?)

..Okay, I'm getting off-topic here. 

The point is, Alyssa was pretty careless throughout the book, and she's also made some stupid decisions even though she's portrayed as the smart one.

Now there are some other problems I have with her character - as I mentioned above, sometimes Alyssa goes to conclusions without thinking it through or preparing (and that's not very "smart", if you ask me), so that's an uncalled out flaw of hers. She also has some other flaws that I will no longer mention, but I wrote them in a way that didn't make her flaws look so bad. 

Next, the way the readers may know her. The book series revolves around her point of view, and overall - she's the main character.  The one whom the readers can relate to. The one whom the readers will root for.  But she was a blank state throughout the book. We didn't get a backstory explanation or anything like that. Yes, there was a hint to it at the beginning - "Her life wasn't always like this. She also had an older brother seven years ago, but he ran away from home. Alyssa had been so happy since then, until her father died." - but that's really all the readers get. Once Alyssa leaves, she completely stops thinking about her old life as if someone erased her memories. 

This rant has been long enough, so let me just list down the ideas for Alyssa (not really sure if this is all of it because I might change them in the future):

-Make her have some flaws. She had some but they were never called out or portrayed as a bad thing.

-Let the readers know about her and her backstory. Remember, Alyssa is the MAIN CHARACTER of this series, and this first book is in her point of view - the readers should get to know her better. 

-Make her curious and smart at the same time. Honestly, I still think that if a person is curious they're smart, but since I didn't make Alyssa show her intelligence, it just makes her curious. 

Alrighty! That's all my problems about Alyssa. The next one will be about Enna, and then I'll possibly write about the other supporting characters as well after I write about Zalina. But anyway, that's it for this chapter. See you again!