The Ghost

The Deserving.

I was in Ian’s room watching him just stand there, leaning on his dresser, shirtless. I couldn’t help staring at his muscular back. It' s lonely not being able to touch and feel someone or something other than zaps. His back was spasming as if he was taking in deep but quick breaths, repeatedly. Was he crying?

Over the past 11 months, I haven't once seen him cry other than the night I died. I didn’t enjoy seeing this. This is what I wanted to prevent. I have to end this pain somehow.

“Turn around.” I said, curiously.

He froze in place, stiffening his back. He didn’t turn around. Ian started opening a drawer and took his shirt out while starting to put it on. He slammed the drawer close. He began walking towards his bed, never once turning around to look at me.

“Do you want me to leave? I can.” I muttered. He didn’t answer my question and I looked down at the carpet. “I was saying goodbye before I left. So I said it and I will see you once I figure this stuff out. See you in a few months I guess.”

Maybe I made it seem longer than I thought it would take, but I had to do something. That was the only ammo I had against him.

“You are leaving?” He stopped at the edge of the bed, but didn’t look at me still.

“Uh, well yeah. I have to.” I said.

“Why is that?” He started fumbling with his phone, looking like he didn’t care. I just continued staring at him, hoping maybe that would have him turn around to look at him. Eventually, he set his phone on the nightstand and walked to his bathroom. Still not looking at me.

I appeared on his bed when he came back to the room. He turned the lights off and got in bed with his back turned to me.

“Why would you ask me that if you don’t give two shits about it?” I laughed though it wasn’t funny at all. He just shrugged in response. “Or it is just me that you don’t give two shits about. Well I know when I am not wanted.”

“No, that isn’t true.” He reached up and turned his lamp on. He rolled over and stared at me. “I didn’t want you to see me crying.”

“Why are you crying?” I asked him.

“Because you are just beautiful and I saw you today and...” Ian trailed off. He cleared his throat but didn’t continue.

“I am coming back. I will find my way to you and Calla both. I promise.” I said to him.

“Why are you leaving?” Ian asked.

“Calla is... Ted is... Body and soul... Coming back...”  I stuttered with it all, overwhelmed with how to say this. I wasn’t even sure what this was.

“You are  ghost, yet I still make you nervous?” He chuckled. I looked up and glared at him.

“Okay, smart ass. I didn’t know how to tell you this because I just don’t know what exactly is going on. I didn’t reveal myself to you both until now because of this. I mean, I decided it was best to not show myself until there was danger and I had to tell you guys about it. Which, now the is and now I need to tell you about it.” I told him about the confrontation with Ted.

“The same way as you?” Ian offered.

“No, this is witch magick maybe. I am using ancient magick.” I said. How could I even begin to explain the difference when I honestly didn’t know? “I feel like this is really bad. Besides the ‘Ted coming back to kill Calla part.’”

“What doesn’t feel right?”

“Him coming back. Maybe it is the how part, but I don’t think he is doing it the right way. Maybe he actually will come back Zombie status more than I. He said with his own flesh and hand.” I shook the image of him choking the life out of her, out of my head. It looked too real for me. “Not only that, I have to figure out what the Royal Dumbass wants with you guys. I have to stay near the Ash and follow Ted. Not only that, I need to talk to Queen Amelia.”