lost in my pain || 𝙃𝙐𝙀𝙉𝙄𝙉𝙂𝙆𝘼𝙄 ✔ [2]

someone saw

"Good to see you!" I wave at my Seventeen hyungs who walk past me, and I wonder what my hyungs said to them. Did they say why I was gone for three-ish weeks? I hope they didn't. I pull at my sleeves to cover my healing wrists self consciously and Yeonjun nudges me with his shoulder. I look at him and wraps an arm around my shoulder, making me a little agitated but I don't say anything. I can't show them or say anything that I hate certain types of touching.

"You're going to be great, Kai," He whispers in my ear, making me blush and smile. "You always are."

"Thanks hyung," I smile back at him and then we arrive at our manager's office. Taehyun steps forward and knocks on the door. When our manager opens it, he greets us happily and lets us in. Once his eyes set on me, he looks completely shocked.

"Kai-ssi! Why are you here? You're supposed to be resting..." He asks, confused. I sigh and tell him that my manager told me I was going to practice today. He shakes his head no. "You were supposed to be settling in." I suddenly get anxious once he turns around and bangs his desk. "Why does your manager have to be a moron? I told him you weren't ready yet. Are you ready Kamal?"

"Uh-" I open my mouth but Taehyun speaks instead for me.

"No, he isn't. He's exhausted,"

"See? Even your hyungs think you aren't ready," Manager-nim says, huffing. "Okay, then I'll just let you do one thing for the schedule. Something easy, like singing." I gulp knowing that Sik would hate it if I missed any of his orders. I don't want to miss any of the orders, he could hurt me or worse, my members. I can't just let him go and do something like this. I want everyone safe including me actually. I shake my head.

"Wait, I can't- you can't, I have to do-" Yeonjun raises an eyebrow at me, basically shutting me up as Beomgyu steps closer to me, leaning his head against my arm.

"What, Kai? Do you want to tell me something?" Manager-nim asks, whirling around to look at me. I blink a couple of times and shrug.

"N-no, I just want to um not miss anything," Everyone's staring at me like I was bug. I shrug again. "I just want to get back to dancing and singing."

"Riiight," He says, barely even believing me. I know he's going to talk to Yeonjun about me, I know it. "Anyways, go sing." I hold back a disappointed sigh.

"That's not what their doing. It's dancing." I pout, sadly, "I want to do stuff with them,"

"Sorry but you're just gonna sing today," Soobin nods in agreement, giving me a sorry look.

"Yeah, you need to rest." Yeonjun tells me.

"I've been resting for two weeks," I glare at my hyung who folds his arm across his chest. Of course, their words are final. I breathe out loudly and look at Beomgyu who does a silly face at me, probably trying to cheer me up. "I don't want to just sing," I whine, hoping my maknae card would work.

"No, and that's final," Manager-nim says, chuckling. He reaches out to ruffle my hair but I step back, not letting him. He gives me a weird look but doesn't say anything. He just walks around his desk and sits behind it. "All right, you guys know what you're all doing, so go ahead. I need to talk to Kai though,"

I stand there, as they each file out of the room. Beomgyu punches me in the arm as he walks past me and I flash a grin at him. Yeonjun pats my back and Soobin blows a kiss at me. They are literally so adorable. Taehyun and I fist bump and once they close the door behind them, manager-nim lets out a sigh and tells me to sit down.

"All right, Kamal..." I lean back in my chair, looking around his neatly organized office. "Some of the LE SSERAFIM members have been talking to me about your manager." I raise my eyebrows, not really listening because it doesn't sound like anything to me but when he keeps speaking I instantly sit up. "I won't tell you who told me, but..."

"What?"

"They say they've seen you and Sik."

"What?" I ask again, blinking my eyes a couple of times. He yawns and covers his mouth, before leaning against the desk with his elbows making me anxious. What is going on?

"This is serious, Kamal," He pauses, "They say they've seen you being slapped by Sik." I laugh, confusing him to death probably. "Why are you laughing?"

"I don't know, but it has to be a prank."

"They also told me that once you came out of the office, you were red-faced and crying." My forehead wrinkled, hoping this LE SSERAFIM member had not seen me or anything. She could get hurt, or worse... the whole group harmed.

"Um, what?"

"She saw you get slapped and when you came out, you nearly rammed into her. That's what she says. I want to know if its true. You need to tell me now, because if he's hurting you, he needs to be stopped." I gulp and shrug it off.

"Manager-nim wouldn't hurt me," I tell him, my stomach squeezing with every lie.

"You have to tell me the truth, Kai, you could be endangering the others... even NewJeans too." I shake my head, rising to my feet.

"Thank you manager hyung, but he's not hurting me. I'm perfectly fine." He sighes and I wish he would keep pressing further, but he doesn't. He stops talking.

"All right, go ahead and start vocals," I nod, bowing goodbye. I walk out into the eerily empty hallway and I fiddled with my hoodie strings when I nearly walked into someone familiar.
"Oh, gosh! I'm sorry!" I gasp and see Xiaoting from KEP1ER. Oh and that means...that means Bahiyyih is here some where. She bows multiple times, her face red as a tomato- or perhaps even worse.

"No, you're fine," I tell her, trying to stop her bowing. "You can stop... So what are you doing here?"

"We were filming a TikTok with Seventeen oppas," Xiaoting replies, nervously. I nod and tell her that it's really cool that she gets to do it. I'm about to ask who did it with her and I hear a familiar voice calling for Ting. I cannot believe she's actually here. I don't want her here to see me.

"Tiing! Where are you unnie?"

"Over here, Hiyyih!" Xiaoting calls back, giving me a side glance. I wave goodbye and decide to walk away as fast I can, pulling my hoodie hood over my head so she wouldn't recognize.

"Who were you talking to, unnie?" My little sister asks curiously.

"Huening Kai, your oppa,"