her antidote

fate

7:59 P.M, Monday, September 13th, 1995

*tick tock..*

goes the clock as i wait for it in anticipation for it to decide my fate. the tension in this room could burn a hole into reality, as my eyes slowly move around checking to see where it would appear. and then they land on him. i read his badge, elijah. 

now my eyes are locked onto him curly brown hair, and the way it slightly droops over his eyebrows. he has very nice facial features, especially the way i get locked into his dark brown eyes, like black holes waiting to suck me in. as he looks over to me, i feel my spine shutter in embarrassment. i hope he didn't take this the wrong way.

8:00 P.M

"alright, now it is time to reveal the results to chris's death."

god, i can feel my whole body about to leave itself again. i'm hoping this isn't another fail. the last thing i need is less sleep, i can barely live for myself anymore with all this stress on my shoulders.

"september 13th, 1995, i officially announce the accused murder for chris pleads not guilty. thank you for your time."

i can feel my tears blurring my vision as i watch that selfish asshole walk out of the room. i mutter, "god damnit", with every power in my body trying not to threaten everyone here. i take a big sigh, get up out of the chair that i've been sweating in for over an hour now, and head out of the room. out of the corner of my eye i see all the policeman looking at me, but i make sure to turn away from them as soon as possible.

well i leave the room, i sprint to my car, eager to get the hell out of here and never come back. im sick with all these cases against my father, i need to come to accept the fate of me never figuring out who his murderer is. whoever it is is indeed very slick. no shit. that fucker ruined my whole life. god damn if i knew who it was, i would rip their fucking throat open and laugh as i see their eyes roll to the back of their head.

the only thing i can think of now is crying in my room like i do every monday for the same news. i don't think i can go another night without sleep. i know the murderer is still out their and probably looking to kill me next. just slaughter my whole family, why don't you. only me and my selfish dickhead of a mother who already left me anyway. you know, i really wouldn't mind if you killed her. actually, i would pay you just to watch it.

8:07 P.M

now that im home, i dont feel any better. my mind keeps going to the dark space in my head, the space with the memory of seeing my father with a knife in his chest. the guilt of not being able to help him, not even knowing what to do to honor his life in anyway since he was killed by a blank face. a man with a mask. how am i supposed to find him, and then make him pay? legally or illgally, its nearly impossible. i wonder how many other lives he ruined. how many other people are crying in their living room just like i am, sitting where their loved one got murdered. seeing the blood stain creep in-between their legs as they move with every shake. still having the memory of the knife in my sight of vision. 

am i going crazy? maybe mad? or sleep deprived.

8:23 P.M

i need a bodyguard. i'm sure the money i got from my father's death should cover it. now that sounds sick, doesn't it. i'm sure he would prefer if i used it to satisfy my happiness. i guess its the way fate decided itself upon me. i should probably call the chief first to tell him my situation of matter. maybe it will sound a bit bratty, by claiming his officers don't know shit of what they are doing. but i could careless.

8:25 P.M

*beep beep..*

as the phone rings, i feel my heart building up the anticipation to drop when he answers.

"Hello? This is chief"

"Hi chief, it's Anais."

"Oh Anais, are you alright? I know the news i shared today could be a bit heartbreaking, but don't worry, our policemen are still on the case."

"Yes, well, this defiantly isn't the first time. I was calling to tell you i am thinking about hiring a bodyguard, to help me sleep better at night. I am still getting this overbearing feeling that I'm getting watched."

"Oh my, I am sorry to hear you are feeling this way. you really are a brave girl and I hope you know that Anais. Don't worry about hiring a bodyguard, that wont be necessary. I can hire one of my policemen to watch over you ever night until we figure this case out."

"Oh. Really? You would do that? Thank you very much, that makes me feel better."

"My pleasure Anais. Don't be afraid to contact me if you are feeling down or need to talk, we are here. I'll send out the officer now"

"Thank you very much! I'll be waiting."

"Your welcome, goodbye and good night."

*beep.*

8:27 P.M

well, that went okay i guess. it may be extremely awkward to have to deal with one of those officers, us both knowing they messed up over 4 times on the accused murderer for the case. on the other hand, it may be beneficial to piss them off and watch their dumb fake faces get angry. imagine if i got ellijah.. haha.  he's probably the reason why my father's death isn't figured out. that scumbag. it may be fun finding this out. now, will i get better sleep? maybe not. but it's worth my fate.