You love letting time pass. Not letting things get to you, but just existing. You went to therapy twice a week, helped Kayoko with her end-of-school party, taught Kyoichi some Spanish, braided Carmen's hair, took Carlitos to get his naval pierced, learned sign language with Katsuki, had a baby shower with Ochako, and announced your pregnancy. It didn't seem like a lot, but it was already mid-July.
The nightmares still happened, but they weren't as current or as bad since you'd talked to Katsuki. This was one of the nights were your dream wasn't bad, but it wasn't the best dream in the world. Your therapist said that when these happen, try to give yourself time to process them before going back to bed.
You did this by getting out of bed and walking through the house, and thankfully everyone was asleep. Even though your feet hurt from carrying this big-headed ass baby, you still did it. You noticed how the floor creaked when you stepped in a certain spot, or you'd always almost trip by the dining room table, or Carmen sitting on the counter with a bowl of cereal.
Now the last one, that was new. "Carmen, it's like two in the morning, why are you up?" "I got hungry." By the tone in her voice, you could tell she was still tired, but to each their own. "I could ask you the same question entrometido." "Just a dream, I've been doing this longer than you've been eating late-night cereal."
Carmen let out a sort of snort, putting her head back to drink the milk in the bowl before putting it in the sink. You noticed how easygoing Carmen was. She was twenty-seven with a degree in entrepreneurship degree specialization, working as a sales development representative for a clothing brand you could never recall the name of. She was getting married to Yesenia in February, and she never really talked about having kids.
Carmen was just so... carefree. She just breezed through every day as if there was nothing to worry about as life would just fall into place so she could strut over it. You were a bit envious of it because your mind couldn't get past the negative thoughts sometimes. It was hard to think that a negative thought ever popped up in Carmen's head.
"Tierra a y/n, ¿tu cabeza voló de tus malditos hombros?" You realized that you'd just been standing there, and Carmen was just staring at you wondering if you were glitching. "Shit, sorry. I just kinda zoned out." "Look at you saying cuss words. Kayoko would have a fit." "Let's not forget who the mother is here, Kayoko listens to me, not the other way around." You couldn't help but laugh because you knew Carmen was right, Kayoko acted like she was your mother more than your daughter.
"Do you ever get scared?" Carmen's question confused you, mainly because it came out of nowhere. "I mean, with being a mother. Does it ever scare you that you might fuck up? You do or don't do something that sets off a chain reaction and then your kids are fucked." You had no idea where this was coming from. Out of all the people who could ask you about motherhood, your sister was the last person you'd expect.
"Well, from my experience of growing up in unique circumstances, it's a coin toss. Sure, we spoil them rotten, but we're also teaching them to be good people. Eventually, they'll take what they've learned in life and become whoever they're destined to be. I believe with all my heart I have good children and that they'll grow up to be even better adults, but that's something they have to choose on their own."
Carmen nodded, slowly intaking the insight you'd given. You felt like you were shitty at giving life lessons, that was more Katsuki's thing. He was straightforward, and because of that his advice is never sugarcoated and he never beat around the bush. You were the nurturer, and he was the blunt force that knocked them back to reality. It was a nice balance the two of you had.
"You're a great mother hermana. Just watching you interact with your niños, making sure they feel seen and treating them like actual human beings. I mean it's the bare minimum but still... I'm a bit jealous." Carmen shrugged, but you could tell something else was under her tone. "Not having a mother makes being one twice as hard, but I try. It's not easy, but it's all for them."
You went over to Carmen and pulled her in for a hug, and when she hugged back you could feel the tension melt in her body. Even though you weren't the best at advice, you were happy this helped Carmen with whatever was going through her head. You inhaled, but when you did you noticed the smell on Carmen. "Are you high?" "Solo un poco."
Laughing was the only thing you could do, Carmen chuckling along with you. "Your friend gets really nice weed." "Sero needs to stop giving you two drugs." "Noooo no no no, we hotboxed in his car last week and it was funnnn. Carlitos almost vomited." You were about to commit about how disgusting that was but you heard footsteps coming down the stairs.
"Oooo, parece que nos despertamos señor gruñón pantalones." Carmen pretended to hide in your chest, and you sighed as Katsuki came into view. "You look like shit." Katsuki slowly blinked at you before handing you your phone. "Hello?" "Hey, shawty bae it's me," Mina said in a very awake voice.
"So Ochako went into labor, I know it's July 22nd and she was due in three weeks but everything's fine. She's vibing and has about an hour before they start the c-section." That was a lot to process, and you realized it was almost three. "Okay, tell her I hope everything goes well, love you guys."
You'd deal with it in the morning, but for now, you needed to get your sleeping sister off your chest.
