KENN found Paul lying on the couch as he entered their studio. He looked so peaceful and in Kenn's eyes, Paul is so freaking beautiful even when he is sleeping with slightly parted lips and a soft snore coming out from his mouth.
He looked so cute that it made him smile a little before he moved closer. He even sat on the floor next to him, facing their sleeping leader. He brought up his hand to tuck some of the hair strands away from Paul's face.
"Ang gwapo mo, gag*! Ano'ng ginagawa mo sa'kin?" he said, still staring at the other man's peaceful face.
He doesn't know what kind of hypnosis struck him but when his eyes landed on that slightly parted mouth, flashes of events from the previous day came like a reel to him. His throat went dry. He's thirsty or maybe hungry too, particularly with something else.
He couldn't believe that he had come a long way. For him, it still feels like a dream and he's wishing it would never end. He's tired of living from his own fantasies. Seeing himself kissing Paul on the corner of his mouth yesterday makes him want to do a cartwheel.
If it's just a dream, he would be very, very disappointed.
He doesn't know how long he is staring at Paul's lips but he has only one thing in mind. He wanted to know if he was really living in real life. Slowly, he crouches and leans towards Paul's face.
He wonders if those cheery lips taste the same as what he has been imagining for years. He is too close to taste it. Just one last push but to his surprise, Paul's eyes open up without any signs of sleepiness.
"Ano'ng binabalak mo, Kenneth?" asked the older in his rich and natural raspy voice.
As if waking up from a bad dream, Kenn blinked as he panicked. He stood up abruptly with widened eyes. His face is flushed with embarrassment but of course, with a hint of disappointment.
"S-Sorry. Sorry talaga. Ano... kasi may ano—uh, may dumi ka kasi sa mukha? Oo, tama, may dumi ka sa mukha." He reasoned out.
Paul sat up, squinting his eyes. "Okay? Nasa'n ba?"
"Uh... w-wala na. Nakuha ko na," he said nervously as he looked away guiltily.
Paul hums, "Sige. Kunwari, naniniwala ako sa'yo. Baka napagkamalan mong dumi itong nunal ko ah. Paalala lang, since we've met, nandito na ito."
Kenn wanted to laugh but looking at how Paul found a way to tease him once again, he frowned. "I hate you!"
The older cackles, "Oh? Okay."
"Bakit ka ba nagpapanggap na tulog, ha?" he snaps.
Paul shrugs, "Bakit ka rin manghahalik ng tulog? Ano, lahat ba ng tulog, hinahalikan mo? Iba naman ang trip mo. Masamang hangin na 'yan."
"Kung hindi ikaw 'yong tulog, bakit ko naman hahalikan?" he countered, pouting heavily.
He's not sure if he saw the older blush but he couldn't see it clearly since he looked down immediately. "Still, that's disrespectful, Kenneth. Always remember to ask for their consent first before doing something like that."
With a scowl face, Kenn nods. "Okay, gets ko naman. So ano—dapat pala ay magpapaalam muna?"
"Malamang. Hindi naman iyan basta-bastang bagay na—"
"Gusto kitang halikan, Pau. Pwede ba?" He bravely declared maybe out of desperation.
The older was taken aback and Kenn almost laughed at how Paul's face turned out. He looks troubled. "Hindi. Hindi pwede."
The younger glares at him. "Ang sabi mo, magpapaalam ako. Tapos no'ng nagpaalam na ako, hindi pa rin pala pwede? Nasa'n ang hustisya, Ga?"
Paul chucks, "Kenneth, hindi porket nagpalaam ka ay papayagan ka na. Sino ba'ng nagsabi sa'yong pwede akong halikan ng gano'n-gano'n na lang? Ano'ng akala mo sa'kin, nagpapahalik na lang ng kung sino-sino?"
"Uy, wala akong sinabing gano'n. Grabe ka naman makapagsalita." He defended himself.
"So? Bakit mo gagawin?" Paul asked, quirking his brows.
"Ano lang... ang ganda mo kasi kanina. Para ka kasing si Sleeping Beauty na naghihintay ng halik—aray naman, Langga! Ang bayolente mo naman." He pouted like a duck, rubbing his shoulders that the older hit earlier.
"Tungaw ka kasi!" Paul side-eyed him.
"Sige, si Rapauzel na lang—"
"Ano ba'ng trip mo, Kenneth?" Paul asked.
"Ikaw. Ikaw ang trip ko. Matagal na. As in, sobraaaaang tagal na." When he saw the older huffed, he chuckles. "It's your fault, Langga. Kung hindi mo lang sana binasa ang nasa comic book, wala sana tayo rito ngayon."
Paul sighs, "Right. At ako pa talaga ang sinisisi mo."
Kenn smiled. "Still, I'm thankful."
"Eh 'di, thanks to me. Tsk!" Paul crossed his long slender legs.
"Ang taray mo, Ga." Kenn stared at him. "Can I ask you something?"
"Fire it up." Paul shrugged.
"May pag-asa ba ako?" he asked, hopeful.
The older looked at him carefully. "What if wala?"
He smiled tightly. "Maghihintay pa rin si Kenneth. Mas pag-iigihan pa niya ang pagpapa-impress sa'yo. Malay mo, baka darating ang panahon na magkakagusto ka rin sa kanya."
Paul nods, "Pero nagsasayang ka lang ng oras sa taong walang kasiguraduhan—"
"Hindi rin. Kapag nagmahal ka, kahit masakit, gagawin mo pa rin ang lahat para sa taong mahal mo at para sa kasiyahan niya. Kahit pa nga maubos ka," he cuts him off mid-sentence.
"Kapag nasasaktan ka na, bitaw na. Masakit nga, 'di ba? Kapag mas niyayakap mo ang tinik, mas mababaon ito. Mas masusugatan ka," Paul said.
"Pero ginusto ko naman ito." He pursed his lips.
Paul shakes his head. "Hindi mo kailangang ubusin ang sarili mo para lang sa taong mahal mo. Magtira ka para sa sarili mo. You needed to contain your self-respect, Kenn."
"Ang daling sabihin, Pau pero ang hirap namang gawin. Parang nandito na ako sa phase na hindi na baling masugatan at maubos kung ang ginagawa ko naman ay para sa taong mahal ko. Kahit gustuhin ko mang hugutin ang pagmamahal na ibinaon ko, ang hirap na. Masyado na kasing malalim. Masyado nang masakit. Huli na ang lahat."
"Kenneth—"
"Don't worry about me. Pinili ko naman ito. Alam ko rin naman na worth it kang ipaglaban. Hindi rin naman lahat ay nananalo sa pag-ibig pero ang mahalaga, inilaban ko pa rin kahit na sa kabila ng lahat ay may posibilidad na matalo ako." He smiled at him tenderly.
"Okay lang sa'yo ang matalo?" Paul questioned.
"Okay lang kahit na masakit. At least, alam ko sa sarili ko na ginawa ko ang best ko. You said it yourself. It doesn't matter if you lose. Ang mahalaga, you give it all. In life, defeats and failures are one of the factors that will make you walk like a man."
Paul smiled, reaching to pat his head. "You've been learning a lot, Kenneth. I'm so proud of you."
"And I love you." Kenn smiled too, looking up at the older and his lips formed a curve downward. His eyes were glassy when Paul leaned to plant a kiss on his hair.
The kind gesture is too much for him. He didn't see that coming. Paul sometimes does it with the other members when he becomes clingy or when he feels like he wants to do it without anything in mind, but for Kenn, Paul's kiss on his hair made him feel secure, wanted, and loved or more or like assured into something he's been praying for.
To be continued...
BINABASA MO ANG
Gihigugma Tika | SeKen
Fanfiction"Even if it is a poison, in the name of love, he will take it all." Poisonous as it may seem but for Kenneth Mier (Ken Suson), he will still walk barefooted in the love's lair if it means that loving John Paul (Pablo Nase) is situated there. Venomou...
