Trapped between a Demon and a Dragon

Chapter 4

"Not really, but thanks for asking though."

"Harper." Misha runs a hand through his hair in frustration before letting out a deep sigh accompanied by a disappointed look. "Look, clearly someone wanted to kill you today. Literally kill you. And...," his voice breaks off and he looks away, unable to meet her eyes. His shoulders are tense, and his hands flex as if he is trying to squeeze out all of the rage and anger out of his body. "You don't realize how terrifying it was to see you there. Lying on the pavement. Unmoving. Covered in blood. I don't think I've ever been more afraid of anything in my life than I was of losing you tonight."

Now, usually seeing someone in emotional distress causes Harper to become emotional in response. She hates to admit it but there is a part of her that cannot resist a sympathy cry. However, watching Misha moan and groan over the trauma he experienced seeing her being attack make her blood start boiling. How dare he try to manipulate her into feeling guilty over not wanting to tell him about her life. A life that he hasn't been a part of in nine years.

"If you were so afraid of losing me," she spits out, no longer trying to hold back the anger and hurt that had been festering for years. "Then why did you leave me? No, why did you abandon me?"

"Harper...I..."

"No, you know what? I don't want to hear it. Because nothing can justify you sneaking out of OUR home in the middle of the night and leaving me with nothing but a note that said 'I love you. But if I stay, I will only hurt you. I'm sorry.' Well congrats on going full Anakin Skywalker with your self-fulfilling prophecy there. Because you destroyed me that night. All I could focus on was that not only did you want to break up, but that you didn't feel like I deserved to hear it from you. Guess I should have been grateful that you at least left a note instead of ghosting me. Then I might still be losing sleep over you, wondering if you were even still alive."

Nine years later and she could still recite the words that shattered her world. The words that made it made it impossible for her to let someone pass beyond the title of friend for several years. The words that caused her to accept a demon's courting proposal because at least she wouldn't be surprised if he betrayed her. After all, who would expect a demon to show loyalty to a human, let alone one as plain and ordinary as her?

Damn. The last thing she needs right now is for all of the anxiety and self-esteem issues she thought she had finally gotten past to come rushing back like a relative seeking money from an inheritance. Guess people do revert back to a younger form of themselves when they are around people from their past.

The bed dips slightly, disrupting the dark spiral that Harper's thoughts were quickly traveling down. She glances at Misha and can't stop the twinge of guilt that shoots through her heart at the shattered expression that her ex is currently wearing. She might be mad at him right now but part of her still cared about him and loathed the idea of being the cause of his pain. At one point she thought of him as the love of her life. It is hard to make those feelings disappear even if you want to beat him with a stick.

Hmm... no sticks around but maybe...

Quickly grabbing the pillow beside her, Harper swings it like a bat as hard as she can at Misha's side repeatedly, trying to get out all the frustration that refuses to be put into words. "Why. Did. You. Leave. Me? What. Did. I. Do...wrong?" Her voice breaks as she says the last word, the question slipping out on its own. She sets the pillow down in front of her, and her vision begins to swim as tears flood her eyes.

A warm set of arms drape themselves over her shoulders and pull her into Misha's chest. "I'm so sorry," he murmurs into her ear, his breath tickling her ear as the vibrations travel through her cheek resting over his heart. "I never meant to hurt you as much as I did. I'm an idiot for not even thinking about how much pain my actions would cause you." Misha pauses for a moment, his fingers running through the ends of her ponytail, washing Harper in a wave of nostalgia. Whenever Misha needed to fidget during a difficult conversation, he always wanted to play with her hair. Annoyed her to death at first but it became one of the things she missed once he was gone.