The Blue Hair Devil

BASIC BI*CH TO BASIC INSTINCTS

JULY 3RD, 2010

Fina-fucking-ly.

It's Winter break here in Australia, and the Kangaroos go into hibernation and the sharks find places on dry land to sleep.

Of course, I'm joking, you idiots. This is not America.

But it's Winter break and yes, here in Australia we celebrate winter when it's summer in America. Summer when it's Winter there, Spring when it's Autumn, and I think you guys are a wee bit smart enough to figure out the rest.

My report card is fooking shite, and no my peers, I'm not talking about the grades, but my parents have gotten another letter from the Dean of Discipline about my behaviour... and for God's sake. I have no idea what they keep talking about.

I'm perfectly fine, I don't need a psychiatrist or need to do time in the Loony Bin.

I'M NOT CRAZY!

I consider myself to be an Angel, well maybe that's a bit too far-fetched. But I'm a giving person, and I know you guys will come to agree by the end of this paragraph.

There is this girl at school by the name of Sheila, and she has the nicest breasts on a Las I have ever seen, so I gave it to her with my index and middle finger in the far back of the school's library.

We got caught by Mrs Raspberry, the school's librarian.

Let's just say Principal Atkins wasn't happy that his only daughter was playing crotch munchers with the school's most undisciplined student.

My mother didn't know what to do when she found out I preferred oysters to sausages. She cried every night for a week, begging the big man in the sky to fix me.

But what's to fix?

Pussy is life, my friends. And life is pussy.

My father, however, didn't say much, and he couldn't because he's the reason I don't like men that much.

He ruined me when I was nine, and I never told anyone, but that's another story for another book.

I am grounded for the rest of the winter break. So, no cell phones to text my girls. No internet to watch my favourite porn videos.
(BrownBunnies is my all-time favourite porn site.)

My parents left for Sydney to visit the grandparents, so I am left under the supervision of the golden boy, my big bro Charlie who is home for the holidays from University. He's older by four years, and he acts like he's my dad.

I am bored, so I guess masturbating to my brother's dirty magazines will have to do.

I am home alone anyway. Charlie went next door to fuck Peaches, his high school sweetheart.

“Who is this beaut?" I question as I sexed up the female on the magazine cover.

Gorgeous blue eyes stare back at me. Golden tresses fall like gentle rain a top of her slender shoulder blades.

There is something about her, something that started a fire in me that blazes so hot and dangerous.