Chupacabra | 18+ | ✔️

▪︎■ 26 ■▪︎

▪︎■ Adrin Bianchi ■▪︎

My heart felt suffocated the whole time we had talked. I felt betrayed. So angry and sad I thought I would take a bomb myself to let it all out. I would've never dared to hurt her. Let alone her daughter. I would rather die myself than hurt a child.

I had really just realised all this. Not the part with the children, but rather about the strong woman who wouldn't even bow when she was on her knees. I could never hurt her. God fucking damnit. What have I done to myself.

Was she worth it? I only ever felt something with women when fucking was involved. And even then, that's about as far as the body goes. It was only physical desire. Not one of them was ever interesting enough for me to give them another chance in bed, let alone if they tried to fuck me over. I never did second chances.

And then there was Ainara. We hadn't even kissed, so why did I feel more involved with her than all these other women? I respected her. I really did. That's why it hurt so bad. To realize she had kept secrets from me, betrayed me.

I drew my gun. I had to know what she had to say. I wanted the truth and knew no other way to get it than to hold a gun to her head. I could never pull the trigger. That possibly made me even angrier.

"I'm not lying. Her father is dead. Emilio knew him, that's all..."

I scoffed. A bit too late to claim you aren't lying, no?

"Why would he want to kill you out of all people?"

I saw the struggle, the willpower she had to overcome to tell me the truth.

"I was the one killing her father. And I tried to kill Emilio Jiménez. He wants revenge and he wants my child."

She killed the fucker... Don't know if I should laugh or cry.

"Who is her father then?" I waited, the pressure increasing.

"José Gutiérrez. He was the father. I killed him five years ago. I killed them all, Adrin."

I let the words sink in. My arm including the gun sank next to my body. When I really processed what she said, I took my hands to stroke them flat over my face in frustration.

Five years ago. Indeed when Gutiérrez and the other fuckers got killed. It would make sense, but do you really want to trust her again? She killed the father of her child. She probably only used you to her advantage. Get your shit together. Protect yourself.

"I couldn't tell you... I had to protect her. I knew you wouldn't believe me if I told you that I had my reasons to kill them, even when I was involved with them and Gutiérrez was the biological father. Be honest, you wouldn't have had considered to work with me if you knew back then..."

I strode up to her again and brought her to her feet. I grabbed her neck and pulled her towards my body.

"You dare to tell me to be honest?"

She gulped and shrugged. "It's true though. You would've never formed an alliance."

The way she got more and more like herself again made me want to scream and smile at the same time. Mostly scream at her though.

"I would shut up, if I were you. I'm the one with the gun here."

I could see she wanted to make a snarky comment but just followed my instruction instead.

"I wouldn't have considered working with you. Because I don't like being used and betrayed." I snarked back at her dryly.

She looked down, guilt mirrored inside her eyes. "I'm sorry, Adrin. It's nothing like me, but... I really am."

I noticed a tear on her cheek and felt myself growing softer. No, not that again. She hurt you.

That reminded me why I reacted the way I did. It brought me back to reality.

"Spare me your apologies. I won't kill you. And it won't happen anything to Erlina, too. I don't hurt children. You saved my life, we're even now. It's very much possible that Jiménez wanted to split us up and for me to find out. We'll follow the plan and meet Iwanow tomorrow. You'll stay here until all this is over. Then we won't see each other again, Ms. Moreno."

My voice sounded harsh. But it was fair. It surprised me I had decided to let her live, honestly. Like I said, I never did second chances.

Her gaze lifted and she met mine. She was as surprised as I was.

"I understand," she said. "Thank you."

My hand left her throat and I turned my back on her.

"Out."

She hesitated. "I thought the door was locked?"

"Knock three times."

Ms. Moreno didn't say anything else, just walked through the room until I heard knocking and the door opening.

I audibly breathed out when the door got closed. My legs made their way to the next seat on their own. After I sat down, I pinched the bridge of my nose.

What a normal, pleasant Friday.

I didn't know how I could trust her in the slightest. I only knew she hurt me, without ever having my consent to get into my head that much. I wasn't even sure why.

The message from earlier came to my mind. If Emilio wanted to kill her, I could use her to get him and finally kill him. It should have been my turn to use her to my advantage.

I wanted him six foot under for godforsaken years. Years of hell on earth. He was the one causing all my pain. Directly and indirectly. Every time his name was brought up, I just knew misery would come back home.

What this man did to me...

He killed my uncle. Made my parents alcoholics that either neglected or abused their only son. My mother died because of him. She couldn't take it anymore- the shitshow at home. Now he brought the pain back again. Why did she have to know him? Why not tell me from the beginning.

A little part of me knew I would've had sent her away or worse if I had heard her say his name in any other context than she used back then.

God, I was frustrated. Torn.

The real question was: what would I do now?