What happened to us?

I love you

It was a lovely friezing morning. The air is fresh and breathable and lets people breathe in and out easily. As I sat on the bus, I admired the cold dark blue sky and the stars that were shining bright. My mind was traveling through my thoughts. Just as I started to drift into a daydream, the bus abruptly stopped. "What was that noise", asked an older lady from behind and I shrugged. "It sounded like the bus hit something or someone." The guy who said that put a sad grimace on his face. "Someone?", I thought with angst, and a shiver run down my spine. Without a warning, a woman started screaming and everybody stormed out of the bus. Only the bus driver didn't. He was so in shock that he couldn't move, and his eyes were wide open. I also stepped outside to see what was going on. I broke through the crowd. As I got closer to the thing on the ground, I got curious about what it was. "Excuse me could you make some light please. So, I can see what the bus hit". The guy next to me said yes and put the light on his phone on. I got a little closer before I froze. My hands went to my mouth, and I started shaking. The "thing" in front of the bus was a human being, but not just anyone. It was a man in his 40 s, his hair was normally brown but now there was blood in it which made it shimmer red-brown. The same with his 3-day beard. His hair was normally short, gelled, and to the right side and it still is but now it is hanging in the face and covers the bruises, the brown eyes were closed, and the blood. He wore a black t-shirt, a black jacket, blue jeans, and white sneakers. In some parts, the clothes were ripped and red from the blood he was losing fast. His Skin normally has a complexion color but now it's nearly white and looks slightly cold like his facial expression. His lips were blue and in the right corner flossed warm fresh blood, so that he looked more dead than before. I stubbled backward and said: "No, no, no, NONONO." My face got nearly as white as his. Before I know it, I ran forwards and fell next to him. My feet were running for themselves. "Oh god no. Please let this be a joke. Please don't be...", my voice got quieter as I came to the end of the sentence, and I couldn't speak out, as if I would he would die right in front of me and then vanished. One of the men came to us and asked with a low voice: "Do you know him?". Tears started to form in my eyes as I turned around to him: "Yes. His name is Sebastian Kolbe. He is my computer science teacher". My voice was hoarse and broke after the sentence. I turned back to the body in front of me. With shaking hands and crying eyes, I started to look for a pulse. To my luck, I could find one. It was weak but there. Before I could say anything, he stirred and his eyes flutter open. His view flattered around before it landed on me. His eyes got big, and he whispered slowly: "Lara? Is that you? What are you... doing here"? In between the questions he started to cough. After he tried to breathe normally and not rapidly, I tried to say something, but nothing came out. So, he asked with a confused look: "Why are you crying? And why do I feel so bad suddenly?". My eyes shot to him. "Oh no", I thought angsty and said in a breaking voice: "You are... you were...hit... by, by a bus". His eyes got big. "Ohhh so that's why I feel so weird and can't breathe right." "Lara, I will die, right?", he asked suddenly, and I stared at him in disbelief. "Of course not. We already called an ambulance. They should be here any minute". "I don't think I have that minute, to be honest with you", he coughed again but now his body started to fight against the pain, that slowly and dangerously crept into his body and his feelings. "It hurts so much. It's hard to breathe. Also, I want to sleep so badly. I am tired", he said with a pained expression. I froze again, but then I relaxed a little. I must keep it together for him. As I looked at him, directly into his hazel brown eyes, I saw pain, angst, and relief. Just as I took a deep breath to get it together, I heard someone choking. With angst, I realized that it was him right in front of me. "Mister Kolbe?", I asked and a few seconds later he stopped shaking. His body looked lifeless, and I started to panic. I tried to find a pulse but there wasn't any life in his body left. "Please you must hang on. The ambulance must be around the corner. Please don't give up. Come one breathe. Come one", I cried in pain and started CPR. When the ambulance came, two minutes later, I was finished with everything. I started to shout his name, as I couldn't get a heartbeat out of him. "Mister Kolbe, come on. Don't leave me. Please I beg you, I beg you on my knees. I need you. I...I...I love you. Breathe damnit". By now I was hitting the chest. The doctors took over and started CPR. A few moments later a woman with brunette hair said to me, with a little smile: "He has a pulse again. We will bring him into Uniklinikum. Would you like to drive with us?". I just nodded and got into the ambulance. Another few moments later we got to the hospital and Mister Kolbe was brought into the emergency room. 4 hours without any word on how he was doing. Finally, 4 and a half hours later a doctor came out and asked if I was the person that came with Mister Kolbe. I nodded and we sat down at the chairs. "Please tell me he is alive and stable", I said with a sad impression. He smiled a little bit and answered: "First my name is Doctor Shawn. Mister Kolbe is indeed alive. He is also stable for now. He lost a lot of blood that's why we put him into a coma, but I think he should be fine. We will know in the next 24 hours." I breathed heavily. "What wounds does he have?". "Well, he has a few broken ribs. His liver was hurt but not critically, and he hurt his right leg." I stared at doctor Shawn in shock. "Was it hurt badly?" "We don't know yet. We will know when he wakes up and is standing again. I think..." "No, you don't understand. His leg must be okay. He loves to do sport and especially play football. He must use his leg. Please doctor is there anything you can do to already look if everything is fine with it?", at the end I was more begging than asking. He thought for a few minutes and said with a sign: "We could do something, but it isn't a guarantee for anything and we have to get him out of coma". I didn't understand what there were doing but after three more hours, sleepy eyes looked at my howling face. A little smile spread on his face, as he said: "Thank you for staying". "Of course. I thought you would like to see a known face when you wake up". He laughed before he regretted it because of the pain. "The hospital called your wife and kids. There should be here any minute", I said with a painful smile on my face. He looked at me and said with a mischievous look he asked: "Lara most of the things you said, while I was unconscious I could hear. But not all. Did you say something else to me?". I turned away from him for a second before I answered: "Only that you should wake up and that I...am that I..." I didn't get further, because his wife stormed in. In the following, she had two sons. I smiled a little as they hugged each other. It was a painful one, but I was just happy that he was okay. As I left, I caught his eyes and he nodded happily even though he didn't say anything I could hear his thank you. I smiled, nodded toward him, turned around, and left.

"I will always be with you, and I will always love you. Even though we will never be together."