Tale As Old As Time

01

Embarrassing

I continued the day as if I didn't embarrass myself in front of the only person who dislikes me.

Great! I feel so ashamed! God, I still wish to be swallowed by the floor.

The class started with us, being seatmates, spreading the awkward air. But, it was only me who was spreading it because I was tensed! Caz, on the other hand, was silent and nonchalant beside me.

And it made everything worse!

My mind is going in circles for god-knows-what minutes. I didn't know what to do!

But as known as the Taliah, I held my chin up high and also pretended that it didn't happen.

It was a heavy day! I was glad kasi break time na! I could free myself from that awkward situation, kaso ako lang naman ang nab-bother! Because Caz walked away as soon as our facilitator dismissed us!

Wow! Hindi niya ba talaga ako kayang tagalan?!

With that thought, I felt bothered once again.

Wala naman na akong magagawa kaya't tumayo na ako at hinila ang sarili papunta sa school cafeteria dahil nagugutom na din ako. There, I saw two of my friends—Ayah and Kesha, who were obviously gossiping again.

"Alam mo ba! I got close with her, and then nalaman ko na totoo pala talaga 'yung kumakalat! Gosh, hindi naman sa judgemental ako pero hindi talaga tama 'yon..." I heard Kesha's voice.

"Grabe talaga! Ganyan talaga 'yan e, nung minsan gumawa na naman siya ng ganyan. Naiinis!" Ayah laughed, but then faded once she saw me approaching. She smiled and gestured me to sit down, kaya napansin din ako ni Kesha.

"Tali! May chika kami sa'yo!" Kesha hooked her arms to mine and then started giving me information that shouldn't be broadcasted in the first place.

You see, I may have been liked by many, yet I choose my friends well. And I got to admit na I am starting to doubt if being close to them was a good thing.

Tahimik man ako, but I observe things and people well. I know that Kesha talks too much that sometimes, it becomes her defense mechanism to not be blamed; Ayah is an inconsistent person to which she should believe in. I have a lot of observations about their personalities that sometimes, I see it as a toxic trait, more than a flaw.

But, I don't have much choice. They're all I have. The only people who had the guts to befriend me. So, I keep my mouth shut.

"U-Uh... You know what, I will grab some snacks and I will head to the art room. I have something to finish kasi eh," I flashed a smile. I noticed how Kesha and Ayah looked at each other, obviously sending out a message to each other.

"Sure!" Ayah said and then continued talking with Kesha. And so, I did buy myself snacks to eat inside the art room. Because I'd rather be alone than feed myself with information that I don't need at all.

As I entered the room, I noticed no one was really there. So, I hurriedly went to my place and uncovered the painting I am currently working on.

It was a scenery of the shore, right in front of the golden rays of a setting sun, with a woman standing. I wanted to create an illusion whereas, the woman had her other half above her as if it was a drifting soul away from her. I wanted to perceive a message that tells you, the sunset is a sign of a goodbye. In this case, her wandering soul is slowly drifting apart because she is growing and losing.

Sobrang mahal ko ang pagpipinta dahil it was a way of drifting my emotions to calmness and serinity. When I feel so much rage, I splash colors in an empty canvas. And despite an unintentional shapes, it looked mesmerizing. Because, that is art.

To find beauty in the midst of chaos.

Since I thought I was alone, my phone is playing a music to make me feel alive and energetic that I didn't notice that I was already singing along.

"Romeo, save me, I've been feeling so alone
I've been waiting, for you, but you never come..."

"You're noisy."

"Ay, palaka!"

I horribly dropped my painting palette and brush that I stained my uniform and looked around in shock. And there, I saw Caz!

"W-What are you doing here?!" I asked, almost shouting.

He laughed sarcastically, "Singing." Then grabbed his bag and walked out of the room.

I was dumbfounded. Just...how many times will do embarrassing things in front of him?! And I wonder...

How many times do I have to watch him walk out because of me?