Toxic Love - the beginning of the end Part | LH FF (Part 2/English version)

F I F T E E N

Friday flew by and in the afternoon was also the second free practice. Saturday passed at least as fast, and before I knew it, it was Sunday.

When I woke up in the morning, Lewis was already gone, for him there were still some things to be prepared. Accordingly, I made the start of my Sunday morning a little more cosy. After I got ready, I went down to the hotel lounge, where I was already expected. Anna, a pretty brunette with light brown, almost yellowish eyes, sat on one of the many seats. I met her yesterday during qualifying, as far as I know, she is currently doing an internship with Angela, Lewis' physiotherapist...

„Liv!" She greeted me happily. She pulled me into a short hug, which I of course replied. „Hey, Anna. Slept well?" In the next five minutes, she told me about her more or less exciting night.

Her speech flow lasted until we finally reached the spa area with pool, sauna and many other possibilities. Due to the fact that almost no one but a few people were here, we had the free choice of our deckchairs. „That's mine!" I called and threw my towel on the said chair, while Anna grabbed the one next to it.

„Now we can really relax..." I agreed with the brunette and leaned back. The temperature in the huge room was pleasant and the moisture pearled slightly on my skin. Funny way, we both wore almost the identical white bikini, even though we didn't talked before we met earlier...

I don't know how long we were there, but it was certainly long, because we talked about everything possible and even quite extensively. She told about her hobby, riding, and I told something about all the drivers, which she unfortunately couldn't really get to know yet. I absolutely have to take her to the afterparty tonight...

At some point we inevitably came across the subject of Lewis and me. Since yesterday, there have been thousands of headlines who want to know what that is between us. We hadn't said anything about it so far, but maybe he'll talk about it in an interview today...

„Does that means you're together, like a couple or...?" She asked carefully and I shrugged my shoulders. Once again this weekend, I wondered how I could explain this between us to someone. It shouldn't be that complicated, should it? I don't know why, but answering this question was so incredibly difficult. I mean, why wasn't it that easy? Why couldn't we just clarify whether we are together or not? Sure, I could of course ask, but the fear that he would drop me again was just too big.

„You know, it's really complicated, and-" I started, but was interrupted. My name echoed on the tiled walls and ceilings, I immediately frightened. Lewis, who somehow didn't look so happy, came into my field of vision. „Can I ask you, what in God's name you're doing here?" He snorted. With anger? „And why the fuck aren't you wearing anything?" He stopped, his eyes pierced me. Anna meanwhile, went completely silent, there was fear in the eyes of the brunette. Probably because of Lewis and his aggressive behaviour...

„Come down, Lewis..." I tried to calm the Briton while sitting on my chair. „How do you imagine that I'm coming down?! I was looking for you and have to find you here like that, that's-" He interrupted his speech and drove himself stressed through his face. I didn't know why he acted like that, but I didn't want to be satisfied with that. He can leave out his anger at someone else, but certainly not on me!

„Say it. How is it?" I let my towel slide off my shoulders and got up. „Come on, you can tell me what it's like!" He gasped indignantly for air. „You really ask that?" His words broke out as a laugh, they hurt me deeper than they should. „You lie here like a damn, a, a, ahrghhh!" He snorted furiously and raised his cap several times to straighten his hair underneath.

At that moment I didn't recognise him. „I swear to God, Lewis, if you call me a whore or slut even once, you will never see me again." I knew that he could quite freak out, and not always be the sunshine on earth, but that went too far. His unspoken words hit me right in the heart. I couldn't do anything about the pain that drilled deeper and deeper into my chest while Lewis just stood there.

„In addition, you have no right at all to tell me what I have to do and not to do!" I turned to go, grabbed my towel directly from the couch and then left without loosing another word. The only one I felt sorry for at that moment was Anna. She couldn't help it at all, and now just going like that was certainly not the finest way, but I had to. And I knew she would understand. Besides, I didn't want the situation to escalate while she's present. She should definitely not think that we always argue like that...

Lewis followed me on the way to my locker. He called me some things, but I just ignored him. I didn't pay attention to what he said, because I couldn't stand his voice anymore. I just didn't feel like facing him anymore.

Today is Sunday, actually the day should be nice, and not start like that. With a fucking quarrel. The first one since we... Oh fuck it. I didn't have a plan what we were, but I didn't want to know it either, at least not at this moment. The only thing I wanted to know was why he can't just leave me alone.

„Stop now, Livia!" He asked me again, but I didn't stop until I reached my closet. Like a wild fury, I tore open the locker door, where my clothes and all my other stuff were inside.

„Damn, Liv, stop being such a fucking bitch!" His voice approached with every step he took. He made me furious, everything about him. How he took possession of me, how he sometimes treated me as if I were a small child. As he tells me things, I hated it when he did that. But something in me felt only more attracted to him, as if there was an invisible magnet that pulls me to him. And I just couldn't withstand this power, no matter how hard I tried.

Then he reached me. I was just about to turn to him when a rattling noise sounded through the air. It was the door of my locker that Lewis slammed. „I swear to you, don't even try to ignore me!" He sounded threatening, the same tone that the cabinet made vibrated in his voice when he slowly reopened after he was literally shattered by Lewis. „What do you expect?! That you can talk to me like that for no reason, and I am grateful to you for that?" I really wondered what he thought. Did he really think he could treat me like such a runaway bitch to whom he can tell what she had to do and not to do?

„Really, Lewis, what is your fucking problem?" I looked at him, could see that he quarrelled with himself to say something. „Is that really what you want? To Argue?" His head shrugged at me.

"To argue?" He repeated my words. „I don't want to argue, Liv. I just don't want that, that- ahhh fuck!" He waved back and drove through his hair stressed. I didn't know what that was, what I felt when Lewis stood in front of me like that. He seemed strange, and I couldn't assess what's going on in him. Would he go up like a bomb if I keep talking or can he pull himself together? I didn't know, but I was afraid. Not afraid of him, no. I was afraid of this situation. It was our first real quarrel since we were... together? Anyway, I didn't want to try it, but I also didn't want to be treated as if I were fucking three. I wanted to know what his shitty problem was!

„What do you want then?" I asked, now quietly again. Then it broke out of him. „I just don't want anyone to see you like that. So..." He gestured his hands in my direction.

„You don't want what please?!" I couldn't believe my ears. „Just because I'm wearing a bikini?" I laughed lightly, what he said could not possibly be the reason. Secretly, I hoped that he would immediately dissolve the fun, that everything was just an unfunny joke. But that wasn't it. He meant it dead seriously.

„You are so sick, Lewis. Really, what the fuck is wrong with you?" With these words, I turned to go. Why did he have to say something like that? Why exactly today, it could have been so beautiful... I knew he was special, but something like that? He couldn't seriously forbid me from wearing a bikini... I could hardly believe it, hoped to live in a bad movie. But it wasn't a movie, it was the bitter reality.

Maybe all this wasn't a good idea after all? To let him back into my heart. I caught myself with the idea of regretting all this. But I wasn't allowed to do that now, I wasn't allowed to start questioning what we have. Not now that everything has gone so well so far.

But did it really do that? Did it really go so well or did I just want to believe that? Maybe it was more appearance than being, maybe I wished it so much that I completely supplanted the truth. I mean, can you call it good to conceal things from each other? I still hadn't told him anything about what the doctor told me, even though I knew it was anything but fair.

That's not good, not at all.

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Well, what do you think. Do you think she will tell him or not? Answers in the comments ——>

See youuu xoxo