pretending again... and again. its a never ending suffering . i feel suffocated by life. it's like i got stuck in a wave , reaching for air CONSTANTLY.
theres so many things i wish i could scream to the univers.
I was always the troubled kid. agressive, piky and i could also say i wasnt known for having loads of empathy to give.
when i moved to sweden back in 2019, my whole self completly changed. long blonde hair,wakeup to school everyday. wearing fancy shit to school everyday. i never trully got that but i at least tried to fit in.
every time i'd been to switzerland i'd catch the swiss way of dressing, of acting., even of speaking once in a while.
perhaps this is why im so confused. because, frankly, i loved all of those different versions of myself.
i am so deeply in the dark in my journey to discovering my true self.
i fully understand i can and want to be as free as the wind.
i just really wish i could have a map or something to guide me. Of course the angels are always there to give signs and to listen to you.
so maybe we are somebody else. maybe that aint bad either.
changing is crucial. whats meant to happen will happen.
Stare into the Abyss long enough, it'll stare back.
