I ran into my room after I left school really fast. I took my blade and went into our bathroom. It was the only room I could close safely. School is hurting my mental health so bad and I have no idea how to deal with that, so my only solution was cutting.
I wanted to feel , that I still can feel something! That's not that easy when you get bullied in school. You just feel so worthless - all the time. And it's not going away. Never.
I watched my arm already covered with scars. I loved to see them. I was proud about the fact that I did this deep enough. But I never wanted that someone else was going to see them. So I did self harm really genius.
I started cutting the same moment I started crying. That was a self harm thing like you know- while you're doing that u just have to cry unfortunately. It hurts. But it's a great feeling. The blood dropped on the floor which was so satisfying.
My mum came upstairs and I shrugged. "Love, r in there?", she asked. I didn't knew what to do so I throw the blade away and I bandaged my arms as fast I could. My mother knocked at the door and asked me to open it but I wasn't finished yet so I gave her a "u-uhm ya, wait a second".
"nah, open the door! Now ! " she said. I didn't wanted to get in more trouble then I would be in a few seconds so I did what she said. A tear dropped from her face down to the floor. So as mine. "goash what have you done ? Get out of here." mum said. My hand was still laying on my left arm.
"we need to go to a doctor or a therapist omg", she added. I didn't said anything. But the last thing I wanted to do was going into a hospital or something like that. But ofc did that happened.
My mum called an ambulance, she was shocked so that was okay. I felt sorry for her I didn't wanted her to find out that.
We arrived in a hospital 10 minutes away from me. The doctors bandaged my arm better than I did. "we'll check you in into a psych ward for two days , they'll check on your writs again later", a doctor said. I nod.
And there we are.
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don't drown me out - ft. YUNGBLUD.
Fanfictiondisclaimer !! - this story includes triggering themes !! (self harm, personality disorder, suicide thoughts & eating disorder") my mum sent me into a clinic where I met a boy named dominic harrison. Everyone just thought that he's a psycho, but I s...
