KEPT

39. I WON'T LET YOU.

KHANYISA

"Awazi wena, during that period, you'd never catch me without lemons. They were the tastiest"

"Lemons? Hayi Ma, even my carrots are better" I say and she laughs

"Khona uqinisile ngane yami, I also don't know what I was thinking at that time but I can tell you this, they were delicious"

"So ubaba would always get them for you?"

"Kuphi? [Where? ] we spent most my pregnancy period apart with him being in Joburg and me here at home with his mother, Maybe the fact that I was used to the sour taste of lemons is what made me survive her sour treatment towards me" she laughs but you can see the sadness in her eyes, there's no woman who wishes to not get along with her mother in law and when I look at the relationship that I have with Ma, I'm very grateful that we have this easy going relationship going on, or else I'd never want to find myself here.

"And now that you've mentioned cravings, I want my carrots. I'll be right back" I dash to the kitchen to get my new found fix then I peel and wash them before returning to the sitting room

This pregnancy is literally all Ma talks about when its just the two of us. I didn't even need to tell her. Just like my mother, one good look at me was enough for her to conclude that something is up

I've been to see a doctor this side because I was curious to know how far along I am and I'm currently on week eight. It's still very early days and Ma agrees that it's best to not spread the news just as yet. Her exact words were "Abantu bazozibonela ngawabo amehlo" [People will see for themselves, with their own eyes] and I agree, I'm from a household where pregnancy isn't something you announce, the baby will announce itself as it grows.

The last few days here have been refreshing, at first it was stressful, not knowing what would happen with Miguel but once Nkosi called to tell me he wouldn't be a problem anymore I relaxed. However, when I tried asking further question as to how they got him to agree he was quick to give a very brief explanation and not want to talk about it, there's something off and I can't shake the feeling, I guess I'll ask him when I see him, whenever that will be...

I still don't know when he's going to drive home but I'm not complaining, besides missing him, I'm quite comfortable here. There's no way I wasn't going to feel at home with Ma around, especially now because she's taken it upon herself to "Pamper" me seeing she might not be seeing me for most part of my pregnancy so she's been saying this is her opportunity before Nkosi comes to get me

I asked how the situation was between her and Mam'Nozizwe and she said things were still tense seeing her husband had made good on his word and sent her home, from there her family came come and apologise on her behalf, another family meeting was held and apparently she started the fireworks there as well asking how bab'Mandla really expected her to be a "return soldier" at her age and that she no longer has a bedroom in her father's house then she threatened to live outside the gate because she had nowhere else to go. Apparently, it was a whole nyovadam with meeting after meeting until he felt obliged to let her come back for the sake of their other kids.

One thing that gives Ma peace is that she no longer comes to the house to do as she pleases, she has since kept her distance and Ma says that's just about the only good thing that came out of this messed up situation. Otherwise, everything else is still upside down, but the senior brothers are trying their best to mend their relationship, it might never get back to what it was before this revelation but at least they still acknowledge that they are family and that they don't want their kids caught up in this so they need to iron out this mess

We sit in the living room and share the bowl of carrots while watching reality shows on TLC just as we've been doing for the past days. It's ten o'clock in the morning and we are already done with the house chores so we can lazy around all we want