Colorfully Love [Series 1 ]

13 Rescue Bud

Daria

Jungkook has been at my house for a few days now and it's going well, I have to say. Not that I thought he didn't know how to behave, but that my parents might exaggerate, after all, they know he's my so-called soulmate. It's really quite scary how everything has turned around, how many options are suddenly open and what you can do. I'm not just talking about our plan to overthrow the system, but how many doors have been opened. I used to feel that my life would run monotonously, which I am really shocked to admit. Jungkook came into my life out of nowhere and gave me the chance to open my eyes, meet his friends and join the group. I mean all within maybe two weeks? It's intense. While Jungkook is home alone when my parents and I are not there, he makes himself useful and helps out. To my shock, he even clean the whole house and my mother almost peed her pants with joy. He tries by all means not to make it look like he is on our neck. At work, however, everything seems different. Jimin and Jungkook speak to each other but rather coldly. I haven't been able to meet up with Jimin to fix our exposition as I usually go to our secret spot after work to train with Cassadie. God this woman is awesome when it comes to martial arts but as a person she sucks. It's a wonder we haven't attacked each other's throats yet, it could be because Namjoon keeps an eye on us most of the time. Somebody can read our minds i guess. Jungkook also does his part and goes jogging with me and endurance training is included. God that I can still stand on my two feet is also a miracle. But that's not all. For whatever reason, Jungkook teaches me how to pick locks, which makes me feel very criminal and yet a bit exciting at the same time. But today it's different, because after class I'm free and go to Jimin. The dispute must be settled.

So I wait patiently until the professor dismisses us and I can go. Until then I'll try my best to take part in the lessons, although you can't call it a sensible lesson anymore because before the exam we just sit there and repeat everything we've learned so far, and that in every single subject. My thoughts keep wandering to Jimin, I wonder if we can really have a reasonable conversation without him getting angry right away. I just really hope that he starts to understand me. Jimin was always like a Ginnie, he could read every wish from my lips and fulfilled it whenever possible. Was I a good friend to him all that time? It's easy to claim that only one person can be at fault when there are always two people involved. Without knowing it, I could have hurt him very often and not have paid attention to what he really needs and especially when. One should always reflect on oneself, right? But what does my reflection say about me? If I dig deeper, I think that means I was the mastermind and Jimin very often just had to put up with me. Poor thing, was I really that selfish?

But even here I can't say it's true, if Jimin didn't want it, he wouldn't have participated or followed me. Man I'm such a dilemma. What's going on with me at the moment, I can hardly think clearly and I don't know what to do.

'Have you ever thought of yourself?'

An echo suddenly comes into my mind, it's Jungkook's words that I fall into. But I can't always just think about myself, so many people who need me and I need them. It wouldn't be fair if I just followed my nose wasn't it? I've often seen life as a tunnel, many of which are the same in different directions, I'm the deco guide and I decide who I'll take with me on my way... but every time one or more stations have to go out, which means I'll end up stand alone in the tunnel, isn't that so? Even though it's hard most of the time, doesn't that mean you have to wait a long time for a green light, doesn't it? But there are positive sides, even if some people have to get out, new ones step in and accompany you on the way. I think at my last stop only one person left me but cleared the way for many to enter. Jimin is still in my train, or is he waiting for me to make the next stop?
I just hope he stays on my train and won't leave me.