Hermitcraft oneshots

Ran away

TW; suicidal thoughts, self harm, depression, eating disorders, starving, s@m
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                                 [Grian POV]

I know I always seemed happy around others, but they don't know how I actually feel inside. Everyone expects me to lighten the mood when they aren't having a good day, but they don't know how much I struggle with life on my own. My past was horrible and I have self diagnosed depression and an self harm addict. I also struggle with food and starve myself ever so often.

I just hate myself, I hate the way I look, I hate the way I talk, I hate the way my smile looks, I hate the way I laugh I just hate everything about me. And that's why I stopped. I stopped caring, I stopped talking, I stopped smiling, I stopped laughing. I hid myself from the others everyday so they wouldn't be able to see me. And eventually I ran away, I broke my communicator and just ran, I ran for hours until I finally found a beach, i made a little camp there and just sat there crying the rest of the night.

I took my small knife out of my backpack and took my sweater off. There was many scars and cuts, each one full off pain. I stroked my hand over the scars, there were huge scars from the times I burnt myself, and a lot of small cuts that were self made. But there was this one scar that hurt the most. It was on my stomach, it was the place I was stabbed in by Sam. Yeah sure I had many scars from Sam, he was terrifying, but this one was the first time he actually hurt me, and it just got more and more traumatizing.

I managed to get my mind fixed on reality again, there was blood covered all over my arms. Shit. I usually get dragged into my own thoughts and continue to cut myself without noticing it, but it was just getting worse and worse everyday.

"Why is this happening to me.." I muttered out to myself.

                             [Xisuma POV]

//a few days before Grian ran away//

I had noticed Grian was getting more and more distant lately, he was always the positive one in the room and made jokes to brighten up the mood. But he seemed to get more quieter and I never saw him smile when I saw him in the first place, I've tried to get in contact with him but he has just ignored me, he has even ignored Mumbos and Scars messages.

//present time//

I haven't seen Grian in a few days and its starting to get worrying, I decided it's best to ask the other hermits if they know anything about how Grian is doing before I do a big move.

<Xisuma> have anyone seen Grian lately?? I'm starting to get worried about his mental health.

<ZombieCleo> no..I haven't heard from him since last week

<MumboJumbo> no, I've noticed he's been ignoring us all lately, i haven't seen him properly since 3 days ago too

<Keralis> same here

<GoodTimeWithScar> I hope he's alright :(

<Xisuma> we all do, I'm gonna go check out his base, and if he isn't there I want you guys to search for him around on the server, alright?

<MumboJumbo> sounds okay with me

<Etho> I hope you find him man

<ZombieCleo> sure thing

I shut off my communicator and pulled out some rockets while I jumped from the ground activating my elytra. I glided down to his mega base imaging the worst scenarios I could see when I walk in.

"Grian..?" I looked around. I looked for him for about 10 minutes. He wasn't anywhere I could see, I've searched basically his whole base, and it was a huge mess inside, definitely not healthy for him to live in such a mess.