Thoughtless jealousy

Breaking down the barrier

A week had passed, Jimin felt so tired, each day he practised hard constantly annoyed with his performance so redoing it meaning overdoing it each day.
He had eaten most of the fruit but not much else, he declined offers of going out for food from the others making up excuses.
Jungkook could see how tired Jimin was but he didn't realise he wasn't eating properly , he thought his weight loss was all the practice.
"Ah can we stop for a bit, I've got a stitch," he lied holding his side convincingly.
"All right everyone, ten minutes," RM shouted.
Jimin sank to the floor against the wall.
"Here," a voice he knew well said.
Looking up he saw Jungkook pass him some water.
"Er thanks..."
He fidgeted as Jungkook sat next to him.
"Don't run away...please?"
Jimin stayed but said nothing.
"How can I make it up to you?"
"You don't have to, you made your point, I've been trying to steer clear and not be the clingy , fake person."
"Your not fake, I was jealous and angry and I aimed my temper at you, none of it was true."
"So why say it, why make me feel like the lowest of the low, second guessing how I interact with everyone?"
"I was jealous ok? I've always been scared you would find someone better."
"Right that's it come on, let's get on with it guys,"
"Damn it!" Jungkook said as he saw Jimin look at him in astonishment.
The time wore on then they were called to try the planned outfits on.
"Oh Jimin you must have lost some weight this is loose on you."
"Is it oh Erm sorry can you fix it?"
"We can , but don't go too far with the weight loss ok."
Jimin nodded aware the others could hear.
"Is it all the practice Jimin, you should be careful, your slim anyway." Hobi said frowning as he properly looked at the other.
"No practice is fine, I've missed a few meals that's all."
"You need to keep your stamina up, don't go down that route again Jimin promise?" RM remarked.
Jungkook was frowning, Jimin wasn't eating properly? Years before he'd starved himself because of remarks of him being chubby, when he wasn't .
"Did you eat any of the fruit?"
Jimin looked over," yes..., all of it,"
This made Jungkook feel slightly better until he noticed Jimin looking away and getting ready to leave.
He followed him," and what else?" He asked.
"Huh?"
"What else have you eaten beside fruit?"
"I...,um it doesn't matter."
"It does are you starving yourself again?!?!"
"No..., I just..., I'm too tired to eat..., I can't eat and practice on a full stomach."
"Well you won't last long on an empty one!"
"What does it matter as long as I get the job done.."
"It matters to me! Don't do this to yourself..."
"Now you care," Jimin said harshly
"I'll always care..., I miss you Jimin....."
Jimin stared at the other his eyes watering, grabbing his stuff he left quickly trying to put as much distance as he could between them.
The numbness he'd felt for days was receding in its place little fluttering of hope but he was too scared to make the move.
He got home sinking onto the sofa, he looked around, this place had never felt like home, maybe that's why he'd so easily gone to Jungkooks.
He curled up in a ball as great shuddering sobs shook his small frame.
His phone rang and he picked it up,
"Yes...?"
"Jimin I'm at your door,let me in."
"No..."
"Please Jimin I'm worried about you...."
"I can't ...I can't do this right now leave me be...."
"Jimin please let me in or I'll sit out here on the floor.."
Jimin hung up tears still running down his face. He wouldn't would he? He crept to the door trying to hear but he heard nothing giving it five minutes he opened the door to have Jungkook fall backwards into his apartment.
"Ouch!"
"Why we're you there, didn't you hear me I said no."
"Yet you still checked," Jungkook said getting up and pushing the door closed.
"I don't want you here, I can't do this with you here."
"Do what?" Jungkook asked walking slowly towards him as he backed up.
"This! We aren't together you should move on ...,, I have," he lied.
"Oh you have?"he came close just in front of him.
"Y-yes,"
"Oh so if I kiss you it will have no effect,"
"N...." Was all Jimin got out as Jungkook claimed his lips in a searing kiss.
At the contact Jimin moaned out his appreciation. Jungkook pulled Jimin by his waist until he was flush against his chest one hand on the back of Jimins neck the other on Jimins ass.
Eventually they had to pull away for air.
Jimin burst out crying hitting Jungkooks chest with his small hands.
"I hate you..., you've made me feel so bad yet I still fall into your arms!"
"Hit me if it makes you feel better hit me I deserve it, I'm a jealous self centred idiot ."
"Yes you are..." Jimin sniffed his head in Jungkooks chest now," jealousy is ok it's healthy in a way but not when it takes over."
"I know but I've always felt like someone will take you away, instead my temper and harsh words pushed you away, it's hard to explain to someone who doesn't get jealous."
"I do...., I often think that the way you and Tae are together means you two will end up together, even though he's my best friend I feel jealous when you give him attention."
"And you've never said?"
"No because I want you to be happy even if it isn't with me."
"Ah baby what are we like, I adore you, Tae is just a friend and that's all."
"I've tried to hold back on being touchy with others and I don't interact much now, it's hard but if that's what you want I-I can do it."
"No .., I want the old Jimin back the one who smiles at everyone, who makes sure everyone is ok, says what he wants when he wants..."
Jimin looked up at him worriedly," you sure, you were pretty convincing in what you said"
"My ego got a hold on me I was being a prick,"
"So what happens now?"
As if on cue the doorbell rang.
Jimin opened it.
"Food delivery for Jeon?"
"Yer here thanks," Junkook said passing him a tip.
Turning he asked Jimin if he could use his kitchen to dish it out.
Once there Jungkook rapidly put food on two plates.
"Let's eat,"
"That's a lot of food...."
Jimin sat at the table Jungkook opposite.
Silence reigned as they ate
Before long Jimin gave up"ooof! I'm full,"
"You've hardly eaten.
""It's tons more than I have eaten recently my stomach has shrunk."
He leaned on his hands while watching Jungkook eat up.
"Jimin come back to mine,"
"I Erm its not a good idea,"
"Why?"
"I don't want to rush back into things....., I still feel unsettled."
"Jimin I'm sorry ,you can hit me swear at me do anything you want but please come back to me."
"Let's get this show out of the way first."
Jungkook sighed then stood up,
"Ok ....I'd better go then..."
"We could...watch a movie?...if you want?" Jimin said hesitantly.
"Sure...sure, I'd love too."
They sat on the sofa close but not touching, picking a film they both liked.
Forty minutes later, Jimins head had fallen against Jungkooks shoulder and small breaths showed he was sound asleep. Jungkook picked the remote up turning the tv off.
Jimin turned snuggling against Jungkooks chest . The maknae smiled, Jimin always wrapped himself around him in his sleep.
He pulled a throw off the back of the sofa and pulled it across them both while wrapping an arm around Jimin.
Just a few minutes then I'll go, he thought breathing in Jimins scent and lightly kissing his forehead.
It didn't take long before he too fell asleep, feeling at peace for the first time in many days.