Crime, Betrayal, and Love (A Seventeen Street Racing AU)

XXXII | Problems

I don't know how long I've been sitting against the door, hugging my knees, sobbing. Every time my tears and sniffles slow down, and when my breathing goes back to normal, I see his face again. The look when he noticed me, morphing into his teenage face the night he betrayed me. And then my breath grows shallow and short again as I'm taken over by anger at how he could do that to me. Didn't he tell me I could trust him? After the anger settles, I cry again. Because how could he betray me like that? The one person I trusted, my only friend. Heck, the only person I ever liked.

"Y/N?" A soft voice calls from behind the door, lightly knocking on the door. "Are you okay?

I cover my mouth to choke out my sob. Things would only be more embarrassing if Mingyu knew I was crying.

"Y/N?" He questions again after I don't respond.

"I'm fine," I say, hoping he can't hear that I'm crying. "I just... don't feel well." I quickly lie.

He doesn't say anything at first, and we sit in silence, each on one side of the door. I want to open it, to talk to him face to face. I'm not sure why, but maybe it would be comforting, but he'd see my tear-stricken face, and I'm not trying to reveal my past.

"Okay," he finally says. Although he doesn't sound convinced, he drops it. "Let me know if you need anything. Okay?"

I sadly smile, "Okay." It's a small gesture, but it feels nice. "Thank you."

He leaves, and I listen to his footsteps slowly fade away.

With the momentary distraction, I've stopped crying. I keep sitting against the door, too lazy to move.

I feel nothing now. No emotion, just a depressing emptiness. I'm not sure if this is better.

Now that Mingyus gone, I notice how uncomfortable the floor is. I force myself up and collapse in my bed. Not even bothering to turn the lights off, I pull the covers over my head and try to block my mind from any thought of Minghao. If I don't, it won't be long till I'm crying again, and I'd rather not have to explain my past to Jisoo.

However, finding something to distract myself is harder than it seems. I know it's weak, but I want to ignore everything in my life. Pretend it's not there, and it'll be okay, just long enough to fall asleep. But I don't seem to have that option.

It feels like I'm being pulled from all sides by my different problems. So many things that need to be worried about. How can I possibly ignore them?

I sift through different ideas in my head, like constantly scrolling to find a show, but I have no luck. Without fail, each thought brings me back to one of the pulling strings.

"Y/N?" A soft voice approaches.

Taking a deep breath, I emerge from the covers to face Jisoo, hoping it's not too obvious how distressed I am, although that's beyond wishful thinking.

"Yeah?"

Seeing my face, Jisoo instinctively runs over and hugs me, "What's wrong?" She asks, sounding like a nurturing mother. "Mingyu said you didn't feel well..." She sighs, "But that's not it. Is it?"

I pull out of her hug. "I'm fine, just tired."

It's such a bad, blatant lie, and I don't know why I even try. It's not like it will stop Jisoo.

"Y/N," Her voice grows stern, "Don't lie to me. You can tell me what's wrong. Is it that number boy?" I can tell she's trying to add a joke to make me feel better. However, it does the opposite. Pushing away from her, I lay down again and face the other way.

"Seriously, I'm fine. Just tried from everything."

Jisoo sighs, "Please, you know I just want to he-"