Matter of Harmony || Oneus Seoho

First Love (6)

Seoho's PoV

Jung Jinyoung. I still remember the day I first saw him like it was yesterday. His jet-black hair almost came down to his eyes, his high school uniform was well-ironed and buttoned all the way. He was mostly quiet, unassuming. His face had soft lines and he'd avert his eyes if you looked at him for a few seconds too long. I hated him at first.

I didn't have rational reasons for it. Yuri had brought him to study with us. I was helping her with her classes throughout high school since I was two years older. Mrs. Kang would give me some pocket money for my unofficial tutoring. Most weeknights it was the two of us, hunched over our books studying together. We'd choose a different cafe to study in every month and order something different every evening. It was one of those things that belonged to us. It was—until she brought Jung Jinyoung with her one day at the end of my senior year.

Apparently, he had transferred to Yuri's class from a different school, when I asked him the reason for the untimely transfer he just shrugged. His silence, the way he was so orderly and almost apologetic for existing made me grow more irritated at him day by day. He was the polar opposite of me, I was loud and self-important, I kept trying to make Yuri laugh as we studied and I was anything but orderly. Maybe a part of my irritation came from the fact that Yuri couldn't stop talking about him. She loved him—from the first moment, they met.

I was jealous of the attention she gave him, it felt like he was stealing something that belonged to me for a long time. He was from a decent family as Mrs. Kang would put it. His mother was a lawyer and his father a doctor. He could afford to attend the private school Yuri went to and lived in a skyscraper when I was just... me. The cook's son. If I knew just a little about the life he had, I wouldn't be jealous.

The summer of my graduation I got my driver's license and the next year I was driving Yuri to her school. My first official job. It was the perfect setup to keep a secret. Yuri would bring Jinyoung with her more than not. It was a mean reminder of my place in Yuri's life as she sat with Jinyoung in the backseat.

A servant I was, and she was the lady of a big house, she would inherit a fortune enough to buy a small country while I started multiple jobs at 18 to pay my family's debt and to get a chance to study music. She belonged with someone like him and it was a rude awakening. That's why I hated him. Until he eventually won me over.

I helped her prepare her small proposal to date him. He cried when she asked. I rolled my eyes so hard I almost fell over as I watched them from a distance leaning against the hull of the car. He said no one ever cared about him the way she did. I wanted to tell myself it was all a lie, all fake. That he had a front. That the kindness and the sadness in his eyes were a lie, but truthfully it wasn't. He had a front, true, but not to show someone he was not, it must have been to contain the knee-buckling sorrow he had behind his eyes. To keep going.

...

When I open my eyes the dimly lit room comes into focus again. A lone tear hangs at my eyelashes. I'm still at the Stag I remind myself, and shift my guitar on my knee. I finish playing the song I wrote for his memory with a last stroke. Somebody behind me starts clapping slowly and I turn my head to a familiar scene. Yuri wipes her eyes as she approaches me. I set the guitar aside and she's in my embrace before I know it.

"His anniversary is in three days," she whispers "I know," I reply, "we'll visit him together like usual." Just then somebody clears their throat. Xion, Son Dongju, stands a few feet away from the two of us. His eyes bore into mine with an intense heat.

He hates me the way I hated Jinyoung. He hates me for stealing her attention.

Xion' PoV

I watch Yuri run into Seoho's arms and click my tongue. Now that, needs to change. A little boy stands in my shoes and watches the same scene tens of times. He's always been her safe haven. I can't make out the words they exchange. Seoho's eyes meet mine. Will he be a problem for my plan? I won't let that happen.

The two of them follow as I find a corner table. I pull Yuri closer to myself and drape my arm around her shoulders. Seoho watches with his chin perched on his fist, the corner of his mouth curls up to a smirk. I ignore it and put on a show. I know how to make people have a good time. It's what I do, make people talk, look interested, dig deeper, be witty, and maneuver my way around if their attention shifts to me. It's like breathing.

They reminisce about the times we spent together and tell me what happened after my family moved away. How Seoho picked up music to help Yuri learn, what a failure that was, how she decided she wanted to act instead. How they'd sneak around... I even genuinely laugh at times despite my sour mood.

When Yuri goes to the restroom it's only a few moments of silence between us before Seoho starts talking. "I don't know why you didn't tell us who you were immediately. It made me warry at first until I remembered. I heard some rumors, you see... But I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. I'll trust you to take good care of her. I'll believe in you." he gives me a smile and a small pat on the shoulder. As if I need his blessing. As if he has the right..!

I don't miss the determination on his face. I nod and return the smile.

So you say, that you'll believe me but also that you'll be watching for a misstep. But two can play at that game. And I am a darn good player.