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a/n👩🏽💻:
happy birthday to our boyfriend
here's a gift
I was high as Jesus sandal when I was editing this please don't laugh:
Sasha yelled at you & Eren the moment you returned one of her 28 missed calls. Apparently she let Jean have it when he called her back too.
"— and you had me sitting outside waiting on you, banging on your door, ready to call the god damn police to see if you were alive! Jean dirty ass ain't answering the phone, Connie's crying & said something about wanting his beautiful melanated empress queen of the motherland or whatever the fuck he said and I dunno what to tell him! Are you kidding me?! Why wouldn't you call me, I was worried sick!!"
"Sasha—"
"Eren don't you even start with me, okay?? Cause I know damn well—"
"—Sash. We're sorry. It was just way too much to focus on notifying you. I knew I was gonna call you when I had time but we're just now getting the chance, you gotta relax pookers." Eren bounced his shoulders holding your phone to his mouth, green eyes scanning out at the road.
"...Eren, I'm not really in the joking mood right now."
"Love you too. Look, we're gonna call you back though. Don't be mad."
She sucked her teeth, "No, we're past that. Dare you dare hang up this phone, like where are you even going—"
"Five..."
"Eren!"
"Four."
"I'm so fucking serious right now, that's your fucking problem, all you do is play!!"
"Threeeee~" he sang.
"Ate."
" 'preciate it." He nodded his head a single time dapped you up.
"Hello?? Hell-"
"TwoOneLoveYouBYE—"
"—EREN— This isn't over you two!"
"We know."
You & Eren's wide eyes snap to each other. "JINX" he mouthed over at you before a wide mouth smile took over his face.
