nobody gets me like you | vada cavell x fem!reader

secrets that you keep

"You told your mom we had sex?"

Vada blinks back at you, confused. Not even a minute ago you'd been on top of her, pressing hot kisses down her neck. And then she'd opened her mouth. Confessed a little too much. As she always did.

"Yeah. It just kind of- came out." She chews her lip. "You know how sometimes I talk and talk I can't stop talking-"

You huff. Climb off her. Shuffle to the other side of the bed.

Mrs Cavell had been so weird when you'd arrived. Overly friendly. Her voice a little higher than usual. And she'd insisted Vada keep her bedroom door open. A hot flush creeps up your neck and taints your cheeks. This was so embarrassing.

"Are you mad at me?"

"Of course I'm mad at you." You say, voice clipped. "I didn't want anyone knowing we'd- done that - let alone your mom."

Hurt flashes through her features. If you weren't so annoyed, you might have taken it back.

"Oh. Alright."

She draws her hands into herself.

"What exactly did you tell her?" You rake your hands through your hair.

Vada avoids your gaze.

"Vada!"

"That we- we did... oral stuff and... I might have mentioned the fingering-"

It's worse than you thought. You stare.

"Unbelievable." You snap. "Un-fucking-believable."

Blood rushes to your ears. You launch yourself off the bed, grab your things. If it was possible to die of humiliation, you think this might just be the end for you.

"I'm sorry." She says, her voice a little small. She draws her legs up to her chest. "I didn't mean to upset you."

"You never mean to do anything, Vada, but you do it anyway." You say. Irritation flooding through you.

Vada was like that. One of those people who floated through life never worrying about the consequences of her own actions. You'd found it endearing when you'd first met her. It's not so cute right now.

She looks up at you like a naughty child who's being scolded.

"So, you do regret it then." She says. Her stare is piercing, "Even though you told me you didn't."

"I-" You trail off. Think for a moment.

"No." You say, quietly, "I don't regret it."

"But you're embarrassed by it." She says, her eyebrows furrowed, "You're embarrassed by me."

She's hurt, you can tell by the way her voice shakes a little. The irritation is gone. Guilt creeps through you.

"Of course not. Vada-"

"Then why can't we tell anyone?" She asks. Her eyes are off you now, she's staring down at her fingers as she picks at them. "I mean. Okay. Maybe I shouldn't have told my mom-"

Your eyebrows fly to your forehead.

"Maybe?"

She ignores you. Looks up, eyes shimmering.

"But why can't we tell anyone else? Why can't I tell Nick? Why can't we tell people at school?"

"Because it is embarrassing." You say, flush creeping into your cheeks, "Sex. Not just sex with you, Vada. In general."