last girl on earth

Shades of Grey

Do you know what it's like to be sad? Do you know what it's like to lose desire for everything? When there's one thing in your life that makes every day better, fuels your passion, lights a fire under you that feels like it'll never burn out. It feels like someone is putting water on that flame, trying to steal my light, my breath, the beat of my heart. Gray, the color I begin to associate everything with. Lonely, the feeling I experience every day, just an afterthought to everyone around me. The bruises come one by one, covering my thighs, my stomach, and eventually my entire body. Consuming me, the feeling of sadness that lives deep within me. The feeling fills me every day, but somehow I always remain empty. The blood, streaming down my wrists, but there's never enough. Always searching for more, cutting through the surface to get to the good stuff. The part where everything isn't gray anymore, but yellow, yellow like sunshine and happiness, the specks of yellow in his eyes. Yellow like spring and summer. A little blue too, not blue like sadness, but blue like the ocean, blue like his eyes. Maybe some purple, purple his favorite color. I have yet to see the color however, all I see are shades of gray and red.