"I didn't get laid with 14. I made that up. I had my first time only one day before I turned 18."
Baffled I looked at Stan, the - at first selfproclaimed - sex and women expert of our clique since we reached puberty.
"You're joking!" Jacob exclaimed. "No way, all your advice was... fake?"
Stan nodded, then he grinned. "Sorry, bro. But that didn't make the advice bad per se, right?" He let out a deep breath. "Phew, that one sat on my back for a looong time."
It's been almost 10 years since he'd made up that lie, I thought while the others began laughing and teasing him.
Right now we five best friends were at my place. We had decided to reveal one secret each which none of us has ever told anyone. No matter how dark, despicable or stupid it was, everybody had to be honest.
Stan had been the first. None of us others had wanted to start.
"You next." Stan grinned and pointed at Jimbo, who sighed and grummeled: "So I always felt inferior to someone who'd actually even less experience than me? Can't believe it."
Stan simply laughed. "I was too ashamed to clarify things. Besides, I did made some experiences back then, just not as far as I had described it. Not even my girlfriend knows the truth. I just thought that I'd tell this lie until it became true for me. But it's your turn now, c'mon Jim."
"I'm thinking, I'm thinking."
"There's nothing to think," I said. I had initiated this whole situation, because I had something very heavy to tell. It had been itching me for very long time already. And I wasn't intending to let anyone off with a half-baked secret. "There is something. I know there is. Everybody has this one secret he's sure of never telling anyone in his entire life. And you gotta tell it."
"Uuh, fine. But this one's really embarassing. I'm warning you, if anybody ever hears about this..."
"Don't worry," I responded. "I'm sure we will be able to top your story."
Doubt flickered in Jim's eyes, but he went on.
"Okay, look. You know, I've always liked your sister." He adressed me directly. I nodded.
"And I used to be often at your place when she was still... around. Aaand... well I... I sometimes tried to peek on her and umm... I also once stole a -" He coughed. "I stole a set of underwear from her." His face turned red. "And I still have it."
"Bro whaaaat?" Vick exclaimed. "What the hell you pervert!" It was really an uncomfortable secret, but also very funny.
"Hey, I would've given it back or something, if she hadn't... well, it's the only thing that reminds me of her now..." Jim defended himself.
"Well, she was indeed hot," Stan added. "But the bro code vorbids affairs with sisters of bros, dude. 'Thou shalt not covet thy brothers sister.' We all know that!"
"Umm. It's alright, I guess she wouldn't mind it now," I said. "Still, what the hell you pervert." I laughed, keeping down my nervousness. "Who's next?"
"Vick," Jimbo answered with a sharp look at him.
"Aint got no secrets, boys." He said.
"Me neither," Jacob added.
"No no no no no. No, not like that. You can't just skip! We already started." Stan and Jimbo looked angry.
"Don't wanna tell you." Jacob stated stubbornly. I watched them fight as the urge to finally share my own secret grew inside of me and finally burst out just as Vick was starting to give in.
"I can't wait anymore!" I yelled, disrupting their argument. "I have to tell someone. And I will tell you! After that I won't let you leave until you shared your secrets too. But I bet that nothing - nothing! - you could say can hold a candle to my secret." I stopped, winded, as if I had ran a marathon. Now I had everyones attention. They've never seen me like this. Usually I was a rather calm person.
I went on.
"My sister never died. That wasn't her in the cascet."
It was out. The others stared at me in disbelief. Only Jimbo looked at me with what seemed to be a shimmer of hope. A hope I'd probably shatter in a few moments.
Shit, will they even believe me? I had to try. And so I started my explanation.
